Beauty is wasted on us
by Kissing-a-starless-sky
Summary: A retelling of the 75th Hunger Games and the events that follow from the POV of Johanna and my own creation Iris. "She smiled and turned her head back to the sunset. "It's a shame we're here under these circumstances." Something danced in her eyes. It resembled pain, maybe even longing." Warning of femslash, language, dark and mature themes as well as torture.
1. Chapter 1

Iris POV

Waking up in a cold sweat was routine now that the games are over. Over? They were never really over. It was something that stuck with you for the rest of your life. Every year they would throw it back in your face; pushing you onto a train and making you lead more children to their deaths. Waking up in a cold sweat was just a routine.

I had never had much sleep to begin with anyway. Since I was young I had struggled to stay asleep for very long. The cogs in my head were always turning. I had always kept to myself, never finding it easy to relate to others or to speak to people in any casual fashion. So for most of the time I had spent as a child, going into my teens, I spent alone.

Wiping the sweat off of my forehead, I swung my legs over the side of my bed. I rubbed my eyes and squinted into the darkness, trying to get my eyes to adjust. It was pretty early. The first rays of sunlight were starting to peak over the horizon. It was nearing the end of winter now. In a few weeks all the children of District 5 would gather outside the justice building and wait with bated breath for their names to be called.

Mentoring those kids was never easy. I'm still a kid myself. At the age of nineteen it has been 3 years since my 'victory'. I had refused to stay in the Victor's Village in District 5 along with the only other surviving victor, and my mentor. Alas, Joff had developed an alcohol problem. I chose to live in the house my parents had lived in before the 'accident'. My mom and dad had both died in a fire that broke out in the power plant during my games. Apparently President Snow didn't think I was enough of a crowd pleaser.

As the day went on, there was talk of an announcement that was going to be aired later that day concerning the Quarter Quell. The last Quarter Quell required double the amount of tributes from each district. God only knows what they'll think of this year.

Come 5pm, all the televisions in the District switched on and President Snow appeared. There was some usual babble about the reason for the Games. Same shit every year. "And now we honour our third Quarter Quell," says the president. An envelope is presented to him. He opens it, pulling out a small square of paper. "On the Seventy-Fifth anniversary, as a reminder to the rebels that even the strongest among them cannot overcome the power of the Capitol, the male and female tributes will be reaped from their existing pool of victors."

My blood ran cold and surged through my body. District 5 had only two living victors. I was going back into the arena.

The information had settled into my system before the television switched itself off, in the same fashion as it had come on. Logic and calm headedness were my strengths. "Panicking now won't change anything." I mumbled to myself. I wonder if Joff had a bottle to spare.

Johanna POV

My blood started to boil. How the fuck would they have know 75 years ago that there would be a male and female victor from each district to decide that this Quarter Quell would work? This is a political scheme to dampen the uprisings that Snow was trying to keep secret from everyone. That Girl Without Brains in District 12 must have really pissed the Capitol off.

Storming out of my house, I grabbed my axe and swung at the nearest tree I could find. The anger burned through me and my muscles were starting to strain against the effort. My axe slid out of my hands and I fell to my knees, digging my hands into the dirt.

"You could do it again you know." A voice came from behind me. I grabbed my axe and turned, poised to strike. Blight stood a few feet away, leaning against a tree. I relaxed and exhaled, tired from my outburst. "Do what exactly?" I asked, standing up and dusting myself off. I looked at him with the same hard exterior I used against everyone. "Win the Games." He replied. I sighed and started walking towards my house.

"It's not impossible." He said, following as I walked. "Leave me alone, Blight. We both know they don't intend for any of us to come out alive. They'll play with an advantage to one of the less defiant victors; the ones that didn't fight the Capitol and Snow." Snow had murdered my family after I won my Games because I didn't want to whore myself to the adoring people of the Capitol. After my Victory tour, I had returned home to District 7 to find my house in flames with my family inside it.

"We've all managed to weasel a win from them. If you hold your own and be careful you could make it." The sun was starting to go down. The orange was brilliant against the different shades of blue, creating a beautiful setting behind the forests surrounding the District. The beauty in everything has been lost on those who were forced to kill others in an attempt to survive. Now they were taking everything away again by forcing us back into the arena. "Either way we're both going in." I said trying to sound apathetic. I was terrified.

When I lay down to sleep that night, the only dreams that came were the faces of the people I had murdered in an attempt to live peacefully one day. Maybe my imminent death will finally bring some peace.

The next day, Blight and I had agreed to start training. We sparred with one another, strengthened our muscles and tried to condition our bodies. I didn't have the advantage of playing the weakling card like I had in my Games anymore. Everyone knew I was a force to be reckoned with. I had managed to win my games through tears and feigned weakness.

I had spent most of the time hiding away from the other tributes so they could do most of the dirty work. When it was down to only me and a career pack of four tributes, I had made my dramatic change and killed off all four in a vicious assault. The people of the Capitol went nuts for this sudden change of events and I earned my place as a victor.

Snapping out of my nostalgia, I narrowly evaded a blow from Blight's axe. "What the fuck, Blight?" I yelled at him. "You aren't supposed to try and kill me before the games have even started." He chuckled and called for a break. We both plopped onto the ground, glistening with sweat and panting from the training. "How are we gonna make it through this?" I asked, hoping his many years of mentoring will give me some insight. He let out a deep sigh. "We won't, Johanna. Not all of us."


	2. Chapter 2

Iris POV

In the days following the announcement, I had trained alone in the woods, concentrating on speed, agility and strength. Joff had prepared by falling deeper into the bottle. I had offered to help him but he had refused, saying he had no chance anyway. The few weeks leading up to the reaping were numbing. The reaping had produced the tributes from each of the districts and produced even more volunteers than any Games thus far. I had met all of the victors when I was mentoring, but not many took notice of me.

For the second time I would be entering the arena along with other scared, traumatised and less than ready tributes. I had won my games by stealth. I stayed in the shadows, trained alone and kept to myself. No one took any notice of me as I killed off tributes one by one from the shadows.

In District 5, my father had trained me to help with security when he was unable to work. He had been ill for years before my birth and had struggled daily with it. He had done patrols outside of the power plants to ensure no one stole from any of the precious coal stores that were supplied by District 12. He had taught me self defence and basic offense in case I ran into trouble when I helped with patrols. He had been my best friend.

When I started to train in the Capitol for my first Games I had discovered a knack for sword play. A katana sword had been my weapon of choice and my ultimate victory tool. I'd have to make sure they had one in the Cornucopia for me this time round.

The day finally came to go to the Capitol in preparation for the Games. I had spent the train ride in my room, strategising. My biggest worries were District 1's Cashmere and Gloss, District 2's Brutus and Enobaria, District 4's Finnick, District 7's Johanna and then the two star crossed lovers from District 12. They were favourites to win this. Capitol darlings.

The nights were long and lonely and filled with guilt about the people I knew I may have to kill. I had no intention of winning these Games again, but if I could help someone else win maybe I could be redeemed for the inhumane acts that I had done in a desperate attempt to win my last Games. But the question was who was worthy? Were any of us really worthy? All murderers.

The tribute parade had everyone portray some kind of plea from the victors to get them to call off the games, but they were to no avail. Nothing was going to change Snow's mind now. There was devastation among everyone. Suddenly everything seemed a bit too real.

I decided going to the training centre would be a good idea. Maybe I could scope out a person that may be worthy of winning this so I could form an alliance and try to keep them alive. Unfortunately that was difficult. Everyone here was flawed, but they weren't bad people. Everyone here deserves to live. I spent the duration of the training time at the edible plants station, silently observing the other tributes training. A few people acknowledged me but no one put any effort into conversation. I acknowledged them in return. This was going to be a difficult decision.

Later on that night, while everyone was supposed to be sleeping, there was a disturbance outside my room. I sat up and listened but there was only muffled whispering. I opened my door to find Finnick from District 4, whispering pleas to Joff to join them on the fourth floor. He refused. When Finnick caught sight of me he offered a half smile. "Are you going to be joining us? We're having a meeting on my floor. It's important." I shrugged and nodded, following him to the elevator.

He punched in the number 4 on the elevator and we descended to the fourth floor.

Johanna POV

We were all waiting on the fourth floor for Finnick to return with whomever he could recruit. Beetee from District 3 had remotely disabled the cameras and microphones in the hotel so we could meet without anyone's knowledge. He put a loop into play of everyone in their beds, so if anyone had been watching, they'd be none the wiser. The elevator pinged, and Finnick arrived with one other person. I had met Iris once briefly while we were mentoring but she was disturbingly quiet. Her hazel eyes scanned the room. Not a very impressive turn out. Myself, Blight, Mags and Haymitch were sitting around the table supplied for dining purposes. Beetee was controlling the cameras elsewhere. Finnick and Iris approached and sat down.

"Thanks for showing up." Haymitch said. He looked around nervously and cleared his throat. "The reason I've asked you all here tonight is to make a proposal." Whispering broke out. He cleared his voice again and everyone was silent. "There have been cases of uprisings in some districts and I fear this Quarter Quell is in place to try and silence the rebels. The uprising began when our two star-crossed lovers defied the Capitol in the games last year." Everyone was listening attentively at the news.

"We have all known each other for some time now and we've all been victims of the Capitol's cruelty, so I think now we have the opportunity to make a difference. I'm proposing we follow in the footsteps of the District 12 victors." There was silence for a few moments after that. "What exactly are you asking us to do? Swallow some poisoned berries?" I asked, breaking the silence. Iris's eyes caught mine at that moment. They were unreadable.

"He's asking us to keep them alive, Johanna." Finnick said, his voice hushed somewhat. It took a moment for the words to sink in. "So you want us to die so they can get out and inspire the rebels?" Blight asked. "No, not quite." Haymitch replied. My hands curled into fists and I stood up, causing my chair to clatter to the floor. "This is bullshit." I turned towards the elevator and started walking.

"We're going to try and get you all out." I froze and turned back to look at Haymitch. "How?" He cleared his throat and poured himself a drink. "District 13 will see to that." District 13. That wasteland out in the middle of nowhere. I turned to leave again when a soft voice spoke. "I'm in. If we can make a difference, we should." Iris said. I sighed and returned to the table, righting my overturned chair, and sat down. "What do we have to do?" I said, defeated.

We spent the next hour getting as much information as we could out of Haymitch. He didn't know the rebels plans but he was going to ensure we knew as the games proceeded. Everyone present agreed to help as best they could, although it was agreed on begrudgingly. There was no guarantee that everyone or anyone was getting out alive.

When the meeting was over, I stood to leave and headed to the elevator, pressing the number 7 on the keypad. A hand reached passed me and pressed the number 5. Iris's eyes met mine briefly. It was the first time I actually looked at the other victor. She had pale skin, dusted with freckles. Her hair was light brown in colour and flowed in waves down to the middle of her back. She caught me looking at her and a cold feeling crept up my spine. Her emotionless eyes were almost empty. I turned away and stepped into the elevator.

She stepped out on the fifth floor and I, on the seventh. I hurriedly went to my bed and stared at the ceiling. If I was going to die, I suppose dying to see Snow defeated was as good a cause as any. Sleep came in fits all through the night.

We had two more days of training before we went in to prove our worth to the game makers. Everyone was trying to flaunt themselves to impress possible alliance members. Finnick was tying knots with the Girl Who Can't keep her Mouth Shut, so I decided now would be a good time to intimidate her again. Her face was priceless when I stood naked in the elevator after the parade.

Stripping down into my birthday suit, I started oiling up for wrestling lessons. My eyes briefly scanned the room and they settled on Iris at the far end of the room. Shadow Girl. My eyes glued on to her for a few moments, but when her eyes met mine I suddenly felt more naked than I already was. She really creeped me out.

Iris POV

Training went by without a hitch on the second last day. Everyone was set on portraying some kind of skill to the District 12 kids to earn their trust. The girl seemed to want to spend her time with Beetee and Wiress. That was good. Maybe they could secure her as an ally. She also seemed to gravitate towards Mags from District 4. She seemed to be similar to me; a soft spot for weaklings and broken things. I sighed and fiddled with a piece of rope, pretending to do something productive.

Finnick walked passed me briefly and nodded once to acknowledge my presence. I glanced over the room once more and saw the boy from 12 throwing knives with some of the careers. My eyes rest on a very naked Johanna, whose eyes had already seemed to be on me. Her eyes tore away from mine and she resumed her training. I stood up and decided to call it a day. I climbed into the elevator and went up to my room.

There was an Avox waiting as I entered but I kindly dismissed her and flung myself onto my bed. I had to come up with some kind of strategy to keep those kids from getting killed. I had no strategy to ensure I wouldn't be killed myself. I sighed and rolled onto my stomach, burying my face in the pillows. I was always better at thinking on my feet anyway.

The last day of training was spent with far more bonding amongst the allies and the District 12 kids. They seemed to be making friends with Chaff and Seeder from District 11. Katniss had made her way around the stations, starting with edible insects with the District 8 tributes, moving to Cashmere and Gloss from District 1. She then practiced a bit of sword play with Enobaria but that proved unfruitful at best. Finnick then took over was instructing Katniss on the trident, and in return she taught him some archery.

Some-time later, Katniss had left the masses to go and do some archery on her own. It was almost as if the room had frozen in time. Everyone had stopped to watch her shoot. She was good. This was good. The more people she could impress, the more allies she'd have.

The next day we all had to sit in a small room and wait to be called for individual assessment. One by one the tributes went in. When my name was called, I stood up and walked towards the door. I could feel a piercing glare going through me at that moment but I didn't turn to see if my suspicions were correct, or who the eyes belonged to.

The automatic doors closed behind me and the announcer indicated that I had 15 minutes to show off my chosen skill. I walked over to a shelf that housed a few varieties of swords. My eyes caught one in particular and a small smile crept up my features. A two handed, single edged katana was propped on two pins against a shelf. I picked it up and examined it. This will do. I punched in a few details on a screen to start a simulation and unsheathed the sword.

The first hologram figure came out of nowhere but my split second reaction was enough to cut through it with the blade. The second came from behind, hearing only the slight buzzing from the hologram, I ducked, turned and easily cut its legs away from its body. This carried until the buzzer resounded. I replaced the sword, leaving without a word.


	3. Chapter 3

Johanna POV

The scores were screened later that night. No one's score stood out apart from the 12/12 that the idiots got. They were trying to target themselves by the looks of it. The careers were gonna take them out in the bloodbath at this rate. I scoffed down the rest of my dinner and went to bed. Fuck you Snow for making me do this again.

The train rattled ever so slightly as it slowed down, coming to rest at District 7. I had made it home at last. As I was walking towards the doors I was greeted with the sight of worried faces from the platform. There was frantic whispering. I caught pieces of it. "Don't let her see yet." And "She can't go home." I suddenly felt very cold as I jumped off the platform and faced the direction of my house. I was running towards the house as fast as my legs could carry me.

"Johanna there's been an accident." I looked slightly startled. "An accident?" This was no fucking accident.

My legs reached the house that now lay in ashes at my feet. The words caught in my throat as tears started to stream down my cheeks. The embers of the fire were still glowing a deep red and three mounds covered in white sheets lay a few feet away. I turned my head away from them and vowed that I would have my revenge.

I woke up with the sheets tangled around my legs and the taste of blood in my mouth. I had gnawed the inside of my lip open in my sleep. "Fucking perfect." I mumbled to myself. Breakfast went by far too quickly and the rest of the day was spent waiting. Always waiting. That was the worst part. The interviews were only tomorrow. I lay on my bed, staring at the ceiling hoping that whatever Haymitch and District 13 had planned was going to work. If it doesn't, I probably would have died in that arena anyway. I was never exactly the favourite.

I awoke sometime during the night. I had no idea what time it was but I didn't care. I got out of bed and walked barefoot to the elevator. I didn't know where I was going but I had to go somewhere. I ended up wandering around the passages of the hotel when I ran into Finnick. We walked together for some time, talking about nothing in particular.

We stopped outside the elevator, just before we were about to go our separate ways, when he looked me straight in the eye and said: "You should go get a drink with Haymitch. You look tense." He turned on his heel and got into the elevator without another word. I knew that it meant that he wanted me to speak to Haymitch about something. I got into the next elevator and punched in 12.

The doors opened to an empty parlour in the penthouse. I invited myself in and sat on one of the plush couches. Haymitch appeared with a bottle of spirits in his hand looking slightly shocked to see me. "I came for a drink and some company." He immediately registered as to why I was here and handed me a glass. He poured some of the brown liquid into it and a downed it in one go. It burned the back of my throat and I gritted my teeth against the taste.

"You know, sweetheart, when I'm at a loss for what to do when situations get tough," He started, "I like to think that I have good friends. 'Cause even when things get a little nuts, I know I have people that can put the spark back into me." Had Finnick been drinking when he suggested I come up here? Haymitch is drunk and useless. He winked at me, stood up and stumbled off to his room.

I got up and went back to my own room. What the fuck was he talking about? The guy is off his rocker. I lay in bed, tossing and turning; trying to figure out what he meant. I fell asleep with the taste of liquor faint on my tongue. I woke up with a start when the words fit into place. 'I like to think that I have good friends.' He must be referring to the group of allies we were forming. ''Cause even when things get a little nuts, I know I have people that can put the spark back into me.' I pounded my fists against my forehead and groaned. Haymitch wanted me to babysit Wiress and Beetee, aka Nuts and Volts, so Girl With No Brain could have them as allies.

I was ticked off for the rest of the day, knowing I now had to watch two other people's backs in the arena. I marched off to the stylists who were preparing me for the interviews with Caesar later on. I was not accepting this Quell without a fight.

Iris POV

I sighed as the stylists faffed about my dress and hair. My strategy; whether it was planned that way, or it was in my nature, was to be invisible. My dress was simple, light blue, straight cut and no embellishments. My hair was done up in a purposefully messy bun, with lose strands framing my face. It was the kind of get-up that the Capitol people had no interest in.

The tributes went on stage, one by one, trying to convince the public that these Games should be cancelled. Each one tried to get a reaction out of the idiots in this city, and each one did. "So Iris, do you have a strategy for the upcoming games? The competition is quite something this year." Caesar asked. I shrugged, indifferently. "My only strategy is to stay alive as long as I can." The crowd was too distraught with the other heart-wrenching speeches to bother about mine. Good. Staying alive long enough to keep Katniss alive was my strategy.

I stood with the other tributes and watched the interviews go by. Johanna had lost her cool and started yelling and cursing on stage. When it was time for the District 12 interviews, everyone held their breath. Katniss was dressed in her wedding dress to try and get sympathy from the Capitol. It was working. Sobs resounded throughout the audience and pleas of changing the games were voiced. When Katniss spun and her dress burnt away to reveal her mockingjay dress underneath, the crowd went insane. Even more so when Peeta announced that she was pregnant. Nice going kids. We all joined hands for the cameras as an act of defiance when the power cut off.


	4. Chapter 4

Iris POV

The rest of the time that I stayed in the Capitol went by in a blur. Before I realised it I was standing in the tube, waiting to be lifted up into the arena. There was dead silence before the timer started. I breathed out once and sent up a silent prayer to the universe, asking if nothing else, to let those kids live. As the platform was rising, I adjusted my wetsuit. The sudden intensity of the light as the platform opened up, was blinding.

I surveyed my surroundings and saw we were in the middle of a body of water, standing on small stone circles. A few feet away lay a stone pathway, leading up to the Cornucopia. I kept my eyes set on a point along the pathway that I would aim for.

5...

4...

3...

2...

1...

I jumped into the water, taking my time to swim towards the pathway. I wasn't the strongest swimmer and drowning before the games even started was not my plan. I hung back while the career tributes rushed towards the Cornucopia. Giving them a small head start, I headed towards it as well. There was struggling, and some screams coming from the island that the Cornucopia rested on.

As I approached, I saw Katniss had already met up with Finnick. That was good. He was the strongest of the alliance and could keep her safe in the bloodbath. I scanned around looking for the boy, but I didn't see him. As I cautiously rounded a corner of the Cornucopia, I saw Johanna and Blight, scrambling for weapons. She was yelling instructions to Blight to find Beetee and Wiress. They didn't see it coming fast enough. The female tribute from District 10 was approaching Blight from behind.

I rushed out, weaponless, and knocked her legs out from under her, before she could stick the knife she had into Blight's back. It was a sort of awkward wrestling match trying to keep her knife away from my face as we rolled around in the sand. I managed to lock her arms behind her back when her body suddenly went still, and a splatter of blood hit me across the cheek. I released her now still arms and took the knife from her hand. Johanna was pulling her axe out of the woman's chest. "Stop screwing around and get to the beach."

I grabbed what I could from the Cornucopia and ran towards the beach along the paths. For the first time I managed to survey the surroundings. There were probably 10 strips of land arrange around the Cornucopia like the spokes of a wheel. Wiress, and Blight were ahead of me on the strip of land. Johanna had doubled back when Beetee ran back to fetch a coil of wire he spotted. I kept running, ushering Wiress towards the trees.

We stopped when we reached the tree line to catch our breath. The air was hot, making it difficult to breathe. Johanna appeared moments later, dragging Beetee behind her and yelling curses at no one in particular. Beetee was cradling his shoulder. He had a gash just below his shoulder blade. "Idiot took a knife in the back trying to get that roll of wire." she grumbled to Blight, pointing at a coil he was clinging to. We headed a little further into the tree line, looking for fresh water.

"Thanks for that." Blight said looking at me out of the corner of his eye while we ventured through the trees. "No sweat." I replied back. We walked for some time before we decided to rest. Beetee and Wiress were a few feet off, talking animatedly under their breath. I laid out the weapons that I had managed to secure. A double edged short sword, two knives and weird looking machete. I handed the knives to Beetee and Wiress and the machete to Blight. I secured the sword to my belt and sat down on a fallen tree trunk.

"Did anyone manage to spot a fresh water source?" Blight finally said, breaking the silence. I shook my head. Johanna was pacing up and down, trying to make a decision on what to do next. I suppose she was our self-appointed leader. The sound of cannon fire echoed through the trees. I used the tip of my acquired sword to make 8 small cuts on the inside of my arm; one for each fallen tribute. It earned me some looks from my allies but no one voiced it.

"Let's get some sleep." The sun was starting to go down. Johanna had propped herself against a nearby tree. "I'll take first watch." She announced. I stood and stretched a little. "I'm going to take another look for some water. I won't be far from camp." Before she could object I headed into the trees. It was getting dark and there were sounds of night animals appearing in the distance. There was something about Johanna that unsettled me. The way her eyes were on me when no one was looking. She didn't trust me. I wouldn't trust me either.

I found a small pool of stagnant water, but from the look of the green algae tinge to it, I knew it wouldn't be safe to drink. I wiped the sweat off of my forehead and cleared my dry throat. They weren't making it easy. I knew there had to be a water source somewhere. I returned to camp to find Johanna leaning against a tree, running her thumb over the edge of her axe. "Any luck?" she asked me, almost uninterested in my reply. I shook my head and leaned against a tree, sliding down onto my haunches. I picked up a twig and tried to draw a diagram of the arena. She walked behind me and looked over my shoulder. "There were 12 paths, not 10." She stated. "There were two platforms between each spoke, making up 24; one for each tribute." I nodded and adjusted my diagram.

"Just so you know, if you chicken out and turn on us, I'll put my axe through your skull." A small smile crawled up my lips. "I have no doubt you would." She slinked off back towards her tree and resumed her watch. As the last rays of sunlight disappeared, the anthem of Panem resounded and the faces of the 8 dead tributes flashed through the sky. It showed the faces of Joff, the guy from district 6, Cecelia, Woof, both tributes from 9, the female from 10 and Seeder from 11. At least the kids were safe. Wiress was mumbling softly in her sleep.


	5. Chapter 5

Johanna POV

I leaned against a tree while everyone slept. If I sat down now I'd probably fall asleep too. I approached Iris to wake her, so she could take the next watch, but my eyes met her hazel ones. "Have you slept at all?" I asked her, sounding more annoyed that I had anticipated. She shook her head and stood up, glancing at her drawing of the arena in the sand. "I don't sleep much. You look like you need some though." she pulled her sword from her belt and moved to where I had previously stood, holding onto a branch above her head.

There was a faint scream in the distance. Both of us fell silent and listened, anticipating cannon fire. God, don't let it be Katniss screaming. There was no cannon fire, but my adrenalin was flowing so I knew I'd never get to sleep now. I sighed and leaned back sliding down the trunk of a tree. My throat was dry and the heat was getting unbearable. There was a rumble from the sky and I looked up, seeing a cloud formation above us.

I stood quickly. "It looks like rain." I said. "Look for something we can catch some rain water in." She nodded and we searched around for anything we could find. "Here." Her hand appeared in front of my face, holding a coconut shell. The rain started to fall. I was so relieved. I lifted my face up to the sky and opened my mouth to try and quench my thirst. Drops fell onto my tongue. The taste of copper made my stomach lurch. It was blood.

I gagged at the taste. The blood rain was coming down in sheets. I squinted against it, unable to see anything. Iris had shaken Beetee and Wiress awake. "We need to go now." She said, a bit too calmly. Blight had already taken hold of my hand and we started to run, looking for shelter. Breathing was near impossible with the thick, warm blood gliding down our throats. Blight was running ahead of me, holding onto my hand in the fear we may be separated.

I was suddenly thrown back and the air was knocked out of me. The weight of Blight's body was compressing my lungs. Over Wiress's screams, the sound of the cannon was almost inaudible. I tried to push Blight's lifeless body off of me. I gritted my teeth against the effort but managed to slide out from under him. This wasn't the time or place to mourn him. I stood, trying to see through the blood storm. My breathing was coming in gasps, inhaling more blood than air. I felt around blindly, tripping over tree roots. I was starting to panic.

As quickly as the rain came, it stopped. I gasped, trying to get air into my lungs. Fuck this bullshit. I stumbled to my feet and started towards where we had slept. Wiress, Beetee and Iris all sat in the dirt, spitting up bloody. "I heard a cannon." Iris looked at me, with what looked like... relief? Her eyes were piercing. "Blight just dropped dead. I don't know what happened." I mumbled. A hovercraft appeared in the sky a few hundred yards away from where we were. Blight's body was lifted up and the hovercraft disappeared. The sun was starting to come up.

Iris stood and instructed us to wait. Her eyes were trained on the place the hovercraft had stopped to collect Blight's body. There was no way I was taking orders from her. "Stay here." I said to Beetee, as he tried to comfort the hysterical Wiress, who was yelling 'tick tock' frantically. I followed Iris. When we found the place where Blight's body had been, Iris picked up a branch and used it to feel around on the ground. "What the fuck are you doing?" I asked her, crossing my arms over my chest. She sighed and kept feeling around with the branch. "If Blight suddenly dropped dead, we need to know what caused it. It could be a possible threat and ignorance isn't a game I like to play." She looked up to me and my heart raced suddenly. There was definitely something in those eyes that wasn't right.

Iris's branch came into contact with something suddenly that threw her off her feet. She clutched her arm and gritted her teeth. I kneeled down beside her and put my hand on her shoulder. "Are you okay?" she nodded once, cradling her arm. "It felt like an electric shock." She picked up a stone and threw it at the air. It rebounded off an invisible force and we both had to duck so it wouldn't hit us. I became aware of my hand still on her shoulder, and even more aware of our close proximity.

"It's a force field." Beetee had appeared behind us, clutching his coil of wire and peering underneath his bloodied glasses. I snatched my hand away from Iris, as if it had been touching an open flame, and put some distance between us. She stood up. "It's to keep us all inside." He stated looking up at the now lighter sky."It appears to be dome shaped." Wiress burst into fits of 'tick, tock' chanting. "Let's get back to the beach to get our bearings." I said, walking off before anyone could object.

Iris POV

When we reached the beach, we ran into Finnick and the kids. I was relieved to see them in one piece. Mags had been killed by some kind of poisonous gas cloud, but she had done it make sure Peeta and Katniss got out alive. They had almost fallen to a pack of mutts in the form of monkeys, but one of the morphlings saved Peeta. It seemed everyone was dutifully willing to sacrifice themselves now, for the chance to end the Games for good.

Johanna explained to Finnick about the blood rain and Bight's death. Katniss was in the waves, rinsing Wiress's hair to get the blood off of her, who was still having fits of 'tick, tock' fever. I walked up to the beach and also rinsed the blood off my body. The salt water wasn't helping much with thirst. "Do you have fresh water?" Beetee asked, cleaning blood smears from his glasses. "We can get some." Katniss announced.

I held my arm against my chest. It was still aching from the force field. My gaze fell onto Finnick who looked at me with concern. I just shook my head and gave a half smile. Elated yells were coming from Katniss a few feet away. "Wiress, you're a genius!" Once we had all had a drink of water from the spile Katniss had received as a gift, we sat on the beach and Katniss told us about how the 'tick, tock' had meant a clock. The arena was a clock with a new threat every hour.

The ache in my arm was worsening some, but it was bearable. My eyes found Johanna across our small circle of allies. Her face held an uncharacteristic softness as she spoke quietly to Katniss. Peeta's hand possessively found Katniss's, and Johanna took this as a sign to leave them be. She stood and joined Finnick nearer the water. I watched her as she walked down the beach. She had a lot of punch for someone so small.

I used the time to disappear to the border of the tree line. I slowly unzipped the front on my wet suit so I could slip my arm out of the fabric. There was a nasty looking burn on the front of my shoulder, just below my collar bone. My arm was shaking a bit. Luckily it was my left hand, so I could still fight if I had to. I started to slide my arm back into the sleeve when Finnick walked up to me. "That looks painful." I shrugged, slipping my arm into the sleeve and zipping up. "I've had worse." His eyes fell on my forearm. There were 11 cuts, neatly spaced out. "It's so I never make the mistake I had made in my first Games." I answered his silent question. "I miscounted last time and it almost cost me my life." I had thought almost all the tributes were dead, having counted 21. I could face off with other two without any surprises. Turns out only 20 tributes were dead and the one I hadn't counted had almost killed me at the last second. I was just a little faster than him.

A huge wave crashes down around the Cornucopia from the opposite end of the beach. We all watch as it over flows and laps at our feet. It must be one of the threats. Finnick caught some fish and gathered a few shell fish from the beach. Everyone ate in relative silence.

We planned to regroup at the Cornucopia to see if we could gather some more equipment and to try and plan our next move. When we get there, we establish that the tail of the Cornucopia is pointing to twelve o' clock, and at 12 lightning strikes the tree. Beetee has a plan to use the tree to electrocute all the other tributes that are in contact with the moist sand. The huge wave (that we also established comes at 10 o' clock) will wet the sand enough to create a conductive medium.

As we stood and discussed the plan, there was a gasp behind me and Wiress fell to her knees. Gloss was behind her. Blood poured from the open wound across her throat. Seconds later there was an arrow protruding from his chest, where Katniss had shot him. His sister was coming up behind Katniss. Johanna pushed her roughly out of the way and threw her axe, lodging it into Cashmere's chest. Finnick was holding off Brutus and Enobaria on the other side. I rushed in to help, drawing the sword from my belt. Katniss shot and arrow at Brutus, but he and Enobaria had disappeared behind the Cornucopia.

From under our feet, the whole island started spinning. I fell hard onto my shoulder, yelling out in pain. Finnick grabbed my wrist and pulled me up away from the water's edge. Our eyes scanned frantically for Katniss and Peeta. Peeta was holding on, dodging flying weapons. Johanna had her axe dug into the rocks, trying to hold on to Katniss, who was slipping closer to the edge. Johanna cried out from the effort and strain, but it got too much, and Katniss flew into the water. The island eventually stopped spinning, and we saw her re-emerge. She coughed and clung to the rocks, pulling herself up.

We got back onto the beach and I collapsed down onto the sand, clutching my arm. I shook off the pain and composed myself. Finnick helped me to my feet and apologised for grabbing my injured arm. Katniss offered to look at it to see if she could help, but I smiled and told her I was okay. I wasn't going to be the weak link. She smiled back and was about to speak, but before she had a chance to, there was a voice from the trees. "KATNISS!" it screamed. Her eyes went wide and she ran into the trees, screaming "PRIM! PRIM WHERE ARE YOU?" Finnick ran in after her, stopping her. Another voice screamed. "FINNICK!", Finnick ran into the trees. He was also screaming now. "ANNIE!" They were jabberjays.

They turned, realising the screams weren't real, but they ran head long into an invisible barrier. We all tried hitting it with weapons, but to no avail. They were stuck in there until the hour ended.

When the hour was up, Johanna insisted on going to get water. Katniss pleaded with her not to go in. She trudged off into the forest, her words trailing behind her. "They can't hurt me. I'm not like the rest of you. There's no one left that I love." There was a deep pang of sadness that over took me in that moment. Johanna was just like me; alone in the world. But unlike me, I doubt it was by choice.


	6. Chapter 6

Johanna POV

We sat on the beach as the sun started sinking below the tree line. Iris sat alone cradling her arm. She pulled a knife from her belt and looked up at the sky. It seemed she was contemplating something. There was cannon fire again and a hovercraft appears. It dipped down five different times to collect the scattered body parts of a tribute. I wonder how that happened.

The anthem plays in the sky and Iris looks down at her forearm. Another 7 tributes were dead. That makes 15 in total. The faces of Mags, Blight, Wiress, Cashmere, Gloss, the female tribute from 6, and the district 10 male appeared in the sky. Iris sat and made the additional cuts in her arm. I found myself staring at her. Tinges of red danced across her hair in the orange sunset. She was strange but there was no doubt that she was beautiful, especially in this light. I mentally smacked myself. What are the thinking Johanna?

I tried to resist but I was being drawn to her. So I gave in and sat beside her in the sand. "Do you mind?" I asked her. The corners of her mouth lifted slightly, a shadow of a smile playing on her lips. "Usually people ask before they sit, but I doubt anyone would refuse you. You'd scare them too much." She said softly, pulling her arm out of my view. I couldn't hold back the laughter at her comment. She was watching the sun going down. It almost made her eyes look like they were on fire. The orange and pink of the sky reflected back in her eyes. I found myself transfixed.

Her head turned and she looked at me. My stomach felt like a lead balloon suddenly. My throat felt like it was swelling and my palms started sweating. I wanted to say something; anything to break her gaze. She smiled and turned her head back to the sunset. "It's a shame we're here under these circumstances." Something danced in her eyes. It resembled pain, maybe even longing. For a moment I had forgotten we were in this arena. I looked at the sinking sun too and managed a nod. My heart raced.

Days before, I had found those piercing eyes disturbing, dark and empty; but now in this magnificent light I could see that she was as damaged as I was. "How's your arm?" I managed to say, although my voice sounded hoarse. She shrugged, her uninjured shoulder brushing ever so slightly against mine. "I've had worse." When did I become so suddenly aware of her? I felt light headed. The last rays of the sun were disappearing. "We should go back." Her eyes locked onto mine. My lead balloon stomach suddenly fluttered and my breath caught in my throat. She stood; but before I could stop myself my fingers closed around her wrist. I let go, realising what I was doing and cleared my throat. I mumbled about getting water and went off into the trees.

When I returned, I couldn't look at her. I was being stupid. Why was I feeling like this? I stayed near to the trees. We would have to go to that lightning tree to hook up Beetee's wire if we wanted to fry those district 2 tributes. I must admit, something about the plan felt wrong; like there was an alterior motive behind it.

I felt a presence behind me. I turned, ready to land a blow but a hand caught me by the wrist. Finnick motioned for me to follow him into the trees. He hugged me and whispered in my ear. "Tonight, if nothing else, cut those trackers out. Get yours out too." He smiled at me and pulled me along to where everyone was sitting or sleeping. I lay down on the sand and closed my eyes, realising how tired I was.

I dreamed of hazel eyes. Swimming in them; no, I was drowning in them. The flames licked at me, but it wasn't burning me. It warmed me to the deepest part of me and calmed the storm within. All the anger I had pent up melted away and I felt like I could breathe for the first time.

I woke with a start. My lungs constricted again and I felt the calmness of my dream dissipate. It was dark but everyone else was asleep. The weight of the situation crashed down on me. I wanted so badly to be back in that dream. I wiped angry tears from my eyes and sniffed. "Fuck all this." I mumbled. "Yeah, just fuck everything." Her voice climbed from my toes up my spine in a shiver.

Iris sat a few yards away, leaning against a tree. "Do you ever sleep?" I asked her, trying to sound annoyed with her, but failing miserably when my voice cracked a little. She just shrugged and twiddled a stick in her fingers. "Do you always shrug when someone asks you a question?" I asked, trying to lighten my tone. There was a sound of sleep mumbling a little way away. Katniss was talking in her sleep, wrapped in Peeta's arms. Iris chuckled softly and motioned for me to come closer.

I got up and strode over to her, sitting cross legged next to her. "Now we can talk without waking everyone up." She smiled. "I don't always shrug. I'm just not very talkative." I watched her twiddle her stick. "I noticed." I said. "How long was I asleep?" She shrugged and replied, "Probably an hour tops." I smacked her shoulder playfully. "Shrugging is so... impersonal." I nagged her. She laughed, trying to keep her voice low. We sat quietly for a while. My heartbeat was so strong and fast that I'm sure she could hear it pounding.


	7. Chapter 7

Iris POV

Her body was radiating heat as she sat next to me. I was trying to figure out what was going through her head at that moment. Why was she so nervous around me? I dropped the stick in my hand and occupied them by twisting my hair through my fingers. She seemed to be breathing almost twice as fast. My hand found hers, as if it was magnetically drawn. Her breathing hitched at the contact. "Are you okay?"

Johanna's eyes locked onto mine, wide, almost panicked. And muttered: "I'm fine." I frowned slightly. I could tell when someone was lying. I let go of her hand, but she tightened her grip on mine. Subconsciously we had started moving closer together. Her shoulder was touching mine and her face seemed to be closer than I recalled. I felt a sudden rush go up my body and I realised that the girl sitting next to me looked almost vulnerable.

I wanted to take her face in my hands and soothe away her worries. I wanted to tell her that everything would be okay and that we'd make it out of this arena and put an end to the games. I wanted to let her drop her facade. I wish I could but I couldn't lie to her. More than anything, I wanted to push her away from me. It was the only way I could guarantee she would be safe from harm. They couldn't hurt your loved ones if you had none.

My body betrayed my intentions as my fingertips brushed her cheek. Her eyes closed at the contact and she leaned into my hand. "Johanna..." I began, but she put her finger over my lips. "We may not be here tomorrow. Don't let me die with regrets." I could feel her breath on my face. Her eyes fluttered closed again as she leaned in and touched her lips to mine. It was feather-light and gentle; something I didn't think was possible for this hardened and angry woman. My eyes closed on contact and I relaxed into her. Her hands moved up to my shoulders and then rested at the nape of my neck. I kissed her back gently, letting my hand rest on her hip.

She pulled back when a realisation hit her. "We need to get going." She said, getting up and walking over to the sleeping allies. She shook them awake and got them ready to hike up to the big tree. We estimated it to be about 9 o' clock. The wave would hit in an hour and soak the beach. We started the hike up to the tree. My fingers ghosted over my lips, which still tasted like Johanna. What had just happened?

She was marching on as if nothing had happened. It was better that way for both of us. Emotional attachment wasn't going to do us any favours if one of us had to die; but deep inside me, something had stirred, and I knew I would die in her place if it came to that.


	8. Chapter 8

Johanna POV

What had I done? I kept walking on, feeling angry with myself. I had endangered Iris. If that had been aired to the whole of Panem, Snow would definitely have seen it. I had just taken a target and stuck it on her back. If this plan goes for a ball of shit, I may have made a huge mistake. It's too late now anyway. So I focussed on the task at hand. My lips still tingled from the contact they had made with Iris's just minutes ago.

We reached the tree, and Beetee got to work immediately. He instructed Katniss and I to go back to the beach and unwind the coil. After, a lot of protest from Peeta, they all agreed and we started for the beach. It was a silent trek in the darkness. Katniss handed the coil to me to take over for a while. It jerked in my hand and the wire snapped, recoiling up the hill. I spotted Enobaria and Brutus. They must have cut it. Fuck. I used the opportunity to hit Katniss over the head with the coil. She fell to the ground and groaned. I straddled her, pinning her arms down with my knees.

She screamed as I dug my knife into her arm, digging the tracker out. I threw it on the ground and smashed it under my foot. I smeared the blood from the wound on her neck and told her to stay down. I threw my axe at Brutus, trying to get his attention. He looked at me, almost smirking, and gave chase. I ran through the trees, making as much noise as I could. Cannon. I looked back to see Brutus taking a detour to slide his knife into Chaff's neck. He must have interfered. Enobaria was now chasing me too. Cannon. Peeta was standing over Brutus's body.

Enobaria lunged at him, baring her sharpened teeth. I ran and intervened, pushing her back. I grabbed Peeta's arm to remove his tracker, but I was knocked to the ground by Enobaria. "Get to Finnick!" I yelled at Peeta, fighting to get Enobaria off of me. He grabbed her and pulled her off. She sunk her teeth into his forearm and he screamed. "Go!" I yelled at him, pulling Enobaria off of him. He nodded once and ran back towards the tree. Enobaria lunged at me, but before she made contact, she was thrown to the ground.

Iris now had my hand firmly in hers and we ran. I wasn't sure which direction we were going but I followed her, keeping her hand in mine. There were screams of some sort coming from the lightning tree. "We need to help them." I said. Before she had time to respond, I was being pushed to the ground. Iris was lifted off the ground and a terrible roar echoed through the trees. There were large claws curled around her torso and she dangled 10 feet off the ground. Huge white eyes flashed as the tiny bit of available moonlight reflected off of them.

"Run Johanna." She looked into my eyes, almost too calmly. Her fiery hazel eyes met mine for the last time, before she was dragged into the forest. Her scream reached my ears as the roof of the arena started to crumble. I fell to my knees in disbelief, digging my hands into the soil. A hovercraft broke through the gaping hole in the dome, lifting 3 people up, then disappeared. They had abandoned me. Another hovercraft appeared above me with the Panem crest painted on its underside. I screamed into the night air; a piercing, dead scream as peacekeepers descended on me.

A needle entered my neck and the world spun around me as I was lifted into the hovercraft. I saw Peeta lying unconscious and strapped to a table nearby, before losing consciousness myself. I sunk into the blackness and prayed to die.

I dreamed of hazel eyes, but there was no warmth in them. They slowly turned white and disappeared. I screamed, but no sound came out.

A/N: Lemme know what you think, and if you want me to continue. I have a few more plot bunnies hiding under my bed.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

Johanna POV

It's been two weeks since the arena had been destroyed and Katniss had been rescued. Unfortunately Peeta was in the Capitol with me. It had also been two weeks since I had seen Iris die. I don't understand why it was affecting me so much. I had killed people, and I saw their faces in my dreams, but I couldn't seem to come to terms with Iris's death.

I dreamed about her almost every night. Her eyes were always white and lifeless. I don't know why it affected me more than anyone else. I didn't even know Iris. I had spent a few hours with her at the most, but she had never told me anything about her. I screamed and thrashed in my sleep, always waking up with my hands bloodied from the hard concrete floor of my cell.

They had just left us in these cells to die, or to talk; whichever came first. I would never talk. I would sooner die than reveal anything. In fact, I wanted to die. It was easier than seeing the lifeless eyes that sought me out every time my eyes closed.

Peeta had been dragged back and forth between interrogation and his cell, but like me, he wasn't going to crack. He couldn't reveal anything anyway. He didn't know anything about the plan we had to escape, and I would never tell.

We spoke softly through the small barred window that separated our cells. It was too close to the ceiling for either of us to see one another though. He always spoke of District 12 and his favourite things about Katniss. I spoke about what District 7 was like but I never shared anything personal with him. He tried to get me to open up, but I knew I never could.

The day came when they unlocked my cell instead of Peeta's, and I was dragged in the interrogation room at the end of the long row of cells. They cuffed my hands to the arms of a chair and President Snow sat opposite me. I spat into his face and smirked. The sickeningly sweet smell of the rose he had pinned to the front of his coat almost made me vomit.

He wiped off his face with a handkerchief and leaned back in his chair. "Are you enjoying your stay here, Miss Mason?" His voice made me want to throw an axe right between his eyes. "Fuck you, Snow." I replied. He smiled and rested his hands on the table that separated us. "Tell me, Johanna, what is it that makes you so determined to protect the people who left you behind?" I leaned forward and looked him in the eyes. "I will never tell you anything."

I was dragged back to my cell, managing to land a blow to the side of a peacekeeper's head after he unlocked my cuffs. I slid down the wall and leaned my head back. Fuck these people. I'd sooner die. I drifted off into an uneasy sleep, when I was woken by a rush of water that suddenly covered me. I coughed and sputtered as the spray hit my face with surprising force.

Two peacekeepers were standing with a fire hose, spraying down my cell. When the water was cut off I pushed my wet hair out of my face and laughed. "Thanks, I needed a bath." I said viciously to the peacekeepers. President Snow appeared on the other side of the small barred window that was cut out of the door. I grinned at him. "Really Snow? Is that the best you can come up with? Clean me to death?" He silently smiled and disappeared from view.

A wire was being fed through the window until it touched the floor. Before I could register what was happening, the wire was powered and electricity wracked through my body. The water made a perfect conductor, so no matter where I had been in the cell, I couldn't escape the shock. I convulsed and my eyes rolled back in my head.

The power was cut off and I was left gasping for breath. The peacekeepers entered my cell, hitting me across the face. One held me down while the other shaved my head. "It's just a matter of time.", one of them grumbled as they left. I curled into the corner of my cell, pulling my legs up to my chest. Just a matter of time. I rested my forehead on my knees as my body shook. The water on my cell floor was tinged with diluted blood. My hands were bleeding. The electricity had used my already grazed hands as an exit point, tearing open the skin on my palms.

"Johanna?" Peeta's voice floated through the small window between our cells. "Not tonight Peeta." I replied, sounding shattered and weak. There was silence throughout the night. Neither of us slept, and I was thankful that Peeta couldn't see me as silent tears rolled down my cheeks.


	10. Chapter 10

Johanna POV

Peeta had spent the whole night screaming. I had my hands clamped firmly over my ears. He was inconsolable. I tried to talk to him when he calmed down, but he remained silent. My heart ached for him, because he genuinely knew nothing. On one or two occasions I was tempted to talk just to end his suffering. He wouldn't forgive me if I had.

"T..they'll get y...you out, you kn...know." I said to him one night. I was soaked through to the bone and I sat shivering in my corner. I was annoyed at how I couldn't string a few words together without my voice breaking. He stayed silent. I took a breath and spoke again, my words coming out clearer. "They won't leave you here. You're too important to them." Silence.

A few minutes later, his weak voice found my ears. "You're important too." I laughed, but it came out more like a cross between a laugh and a sob. "I don't have anyone losing sleep over me, I guarantee that." My stomach dropped as my own words stung my heart. He was silent again. "You know Katniss will..." but before I could finish, Peeta had started screaming and banging his fists on the walls and floor.

I eventually fell into an uneasy sleep, but I never felt rested. Tonight I was floating in a fiery ocean. I thrashed against the water, anticipating electricity to wrack my body as it had been every day for the last week. I screamed but no sound escaped my mouth. The water pulled me under. I drew one last breath before my head fell below the waves. I floated in the darkness, my lungs burning for air, but never being able to die.

Arms encircled my waist from behind and a voice echoed in my ear. "You think it's that easy to get out? You'll never get out." Iris's voice filled my head and the arms disappeared. My arms searched frantically for her but they caught only emptiness. Water rushed into my lungs and I choked. Let me die. Please. Let me die.

I woke up, screaming and dragging my nails along the concrete. I inhaled deeply, forcing air into my lungs. My screaming stopped when another scream came from the passage. It wasn't Peeta's scream. "Please. Please I just want to go home." The woman was sobbing now. "Don't worry, miss Cresta. You'll go home soon." A malicious voice laughed as the woman sobbed louder. Annie. Fuck, they got Annie.

I stood and tried to make my way to the door. My legs gave way and my knees hit the floor with such force that I gasped and felt the shock spread up my spine. I stood again, steadying myself against the wall. "Annie." I called out softly to her as I made my way to the door. Her crying didn't stop. I reached the door and pressed my face to the small barred window. "Annie." I repeated.

Her crying subsided a bit. My legs were straining to keep me upright. "Annie, it's Johanna." There was shuffling behind her door and her face appeared at her own window. Her hair was perfectly in place and her eyes were red from crying. She gasped and covered her mouth with her hand. Her eyes were wide as she stared at me. "Johanna, what happened?" She asked frantically. I forced a smile. "Just been on vacation Annie." My joke didn't penetrate though.

"Did they hurt you?" I asked after seconds of silent staring. She shook her head slowly and spoke. "They came to my house a few days and told me they needed me to answer some questions, but I had no idea what they were talking about so..." her voice trailed off and she zoned out. I sighed and slid down the door, exhausted from the effort of standing. They were keeping her captive to try and get to Finnick.

No one came that day to electrocute or interrogate me, but they did drag Peeta away. He didn't come back that night. I cried, muffling my sobs by biting into my arm. I didn't want to upset Annie. She was so fragile as it is. She wouldn't hear me over her own crying anyway. I prayed to whatever power there was in the universe that they didn't hurt her. I also said a silent prayer for myself; just let my heart stop beating when they sent electricity through my body tomorrow.


	11. Chapter 11

Johanna POV

The most difficult thing about being electrocuted was that I couldn't even bring myself to scream. The current surged through my muscles and nerves, contracting them all at once. My jaw clamped shut and my body thrashed around, out of my control. I caught my breath between shocks. "Fuck...you." I spat as a second jolt went through my body. Muffled cries came from across the hallway.

I was dragged away, dripping water along the hallway as they shoved me into the interrogation room. President Snow entered and sat down. They didn't bother restraining me, knowing I was too weak to fight back. They fed us just enough to keep us going so they could get what they wanted. Water on the other hand, was withheld until they soaked me in it. I was reduced to swallowing the few mouthfuls that I could from the drenched floor.

"Johanna, are you going to continue putting yourself through this?" Snow said looking down at me as I lay on the floor. "F...fuck you." I stammered. He sighed and shook his head. "You could end all of this." I choked out a laugh. "You could end it too." I said, bringing my head up to look at him. "Just kill me and be done with it. I'll never talk."

I was dragged back to the cell. Annie's panicked eyes followed me through her little barred window. Peeta's cell still stood empty. I wonder if they had finally killed him. I crawled into my corner and wrapped my arms around my knees, trying to generate some warmth. The peacekeepers returned moments later to deliver more shocks.

They repeatedly electrocuted me through the night, stopping just before my heart would stop beating, and then giving me time to recover. I stayed in my corner and rocked myself back and forth. I whimpered softly, trying not to upset Annie across from me. She was quiet so I assumed she was sleeping.

I rested my head against the wall and started banging it softly against the concrete. I hit my head harder and harder until I felt blood pouring down my forehead. Give me the strength to end it. A peacekeeper arrived and pulled me away from the wall, restraining my hands behind my back. "You're pathetic Mason." His voice echoed through the empty cell.

His hands gripped my waist, tearing at my tattered clothing. I struggled against him, trying to free my hands but I was so weak. "Please." I begged quietly. "Don't." His large hand struck me across the cheek. "Shut up." His hands roamed my body and hot tears ran down my cheeks. Lips touched my neck and his weight compressed my lungs.

With the last bit of strength I could muster, I sank my teeth the angle of his neck. His cries of pain forced him off of me and I inhaled deeply, gasping for air. Blood poured from the open wound. His foot connected with my ribs. "You'll pay for that." He said, keeping pressure on his bleeding neck. The door to my cell swung shut loudly and I was alone again. Annie's muffled sobs echoed, vibrating through my bruised and bleeding body. "Iris." The name rolled off my lips hopelessly. "You're lucky you got out in time."

I awoke to a loud explosion. My hands were still bound behind my back. My shoulders ached from the position they were in and my clothes hung off my body, exposing parts of my flesh. Annie was screaming across the hall from me. There were footsteps coming down the hallway; multiple pairs by the sound of it. I tried to sit up, but my face made contact with the ground again. The taste of the peacekeeper's blood stuck to my tongue and my skin felt tight from my own blood having dried to the side of my face.

Doors slammed multiple times and someone was calling out, but I couldn't make out the words. My head spun violently and my stomach twisted. My breathing came shallowly and my ears rang. Maybe this was what dying felt like. I lost consciousness as my cell door flew open and arms lifted me off the ground. "Iris." I mumbled, falling into blackness.

A/N: Sorry the chapters are a little shorter than the previous ones. They'll start getting longer as we go along. Thanks to the people who have read and added the fic to their fav lists


	12. Chapter 12

Johanna POV

Beeping and soft talking woke me up. My eyes fluttered open, but shut almost immediately when bright florescent lights stung them. A pair of hands touched my face and before I could register it my arms were swinging wildly, trying to hit whoever they belonged to. "Fuck you. You won't get anything out of me."

My hands were restrained and my eyes tried to adjust to the bright lights. I fought against the restraints, feeling stronger than I had in weeks. "Johanna, calm down." Hands were on my face again and a pair of blue eyes were staring at me. I scanned the room frantically, looking for a way out. This wasn't my cell. "You're safe in District 13." This was a trick. They were using this to break me. "Get your hands off me!" I screamed and thrashed. No one would break me.

"Bring her in." The same voice said. I looked at the door standing in the doorway was Katniss fucking Everdeen. My heart was beating wildly. They'd captured her too. The rebellion was over. She looked healthy and unharmed but I knew they were just using her to fool me. "Run Katniss!" I yelled. "Get out!"

She sighed softly and walked towards me, sitting on a chair alongside the bed I was strapped to. "Johanna you're safe. We really are in District 13. No one is going to hurt you." She lay her hand over mine. This wasn't Katniss. It couldn't be. "I won't break!" I struggled and tried to free myself. "You can't use your mutts against me Snow!" The Katniss mutt looked hurt at my comment but I knew that it was a ploy. A needle slipped into my arm and I floated off into oblivion once more.

I awoke in the same room. There were tubes coming out of my arm and I was still tied to the bed. The room was empty this time around though. A girl appeared through the door. "Ah, you're awake." She said as she approached me. Her face was gentle and oddly familiar. I strained to remember where I had seen her before. She couldn't be older than 15.

She reached for a glass and sat on the chair next to my bed. She held the glass to me, adjusting the straw that poked out of it, angling it towards my lips. I pulled away. "You must be thirsty. It's been two days since they brought you in." She smiled slightly and took a sip from the glass. "It's not poisoned." She brought it closer to my face. I drank through the straw, relishing in the relief that it brought to my dry throat.

"You look much better." She noted with a smile. I recognised her now. It was Katniss's sister; the one she volunteered for a year ago. "Thanks." I said hoarsely. She smiled, revealing her teeth. The doors slid open behind her. Katniss walked in and put her hand on her sister's shoulder. "Give us a minute Prim?" She said, kissing her forehead. Primrose. That was her name.

Katniss sat down when her sister left. "How do you feel, Johanna?" I snorted. "Great thanks, Brainless." She gave the hint of a smile but I could see she wasn't fond of her new nickname. "You think you could untie me?" I asked, gesturing towards my wrists. "Only if you promise not to hit me." She replied with a hint of humour in her voice. "No promises."

We sat for a while after she had untied my wrists. There was an awkward silence in the air. "Where's Annie?" I asked. "She's with Finnick right now. He wasn't doing so well when he heard she had been captured along with you and Peeta." My throat tightened slightly. "And Peeta..?" The question hung in the air. I dreaded to hear that he hadn't made it. "He's...alive." Relief washed over me. "He isn't doing so well either. They've messed with his head somewhat." I looked at my bruised wrists. "He's alive though." She nodded.

There was more silence between us. "Are you okay Johanna?" She looked at me, her eyes filled with pity and regret. I felt anger creeping up my spine. I didn't want anyone's pity or sympathy. "Fine." I spat, a little too harshly, suddenly wishing I could take it back. It wasn't her fault I had ended up in the Capitol. I had agreed to protect her.

Her hand rested on mine once more, squeezing it gently as if it might shatter. "I'll see you later Johanna." She got up and left. I wanted to call her back, but I wouldn't be weak. I crossed my arms over my chest, yanking the tubes out of my veins.

Moments later there was a voice at the door. "I hope you gave them hell." Finnick smiled gently, leaning against the doorway. "How do you know me?" I replied, motioning for him to come closer. He approached and pulled me into a hug. I breathed in his smell and relaxed into the hug. My eyes watered and I sniffed, wiping the tears away.

He sat with me for a while, his eyes scanning over me every now and then as he filled me in on what was happening in District 13. "What did they do to you Jo?" He said softly, looking as if he was standing on melting ice. "I looked at my hands and shook my head. He laid his hand over mine, enveloping it.

"I hate to bring this up straight after you've been through everything and all," He started, searching my eyes with his, "do you know what happened to Iris? We didn't find her in the Capitol prisons." My heart shattered. I sobbed, grabbing onto his shirt and burying my face in his neck. "She didn't... she didn't... I couldn't..." he rubbed my back as a cried in his arms.


	13. Chapter 13

Thanks a lot for the positive feedback, favs and views from everyone. Much appreciated!

Johanna POV

District 13 was the lesser of two evils, but it was like being moved from one prison to another. I was restricted to the ward I was placed in. "You should be grateful that you have this kind of care, or you may have died." One of the nurses had said this to me while they held me down and forced me into a tub full of water.

They didn't come out of it unscathed. "The less you struggle, the easier it will be to get done, Johanna." That nurse had ended up almost losing an eye when my nails scraped over the side of her face. Another had a broken knuckle on her left hand when she tried to restrain me in the water. The sedatives weren't working much in their favour.

I fell into a kind of numb panic, if that was even possible. I fought against them; against the drugs, but I felt empty inside. Finnick had stopped coming to see me for a while now. Apparently Annie couldn't handle him being away from her, and he couldn't bring her with him in the fear that my condition would upset her.

I saw Katniss every now and then. She would linger at the door and share a few words with me but she also kept her distance. I saw myself in the mirror for the first time since I had been rescued. It wasn't a surprise as to why everyone avoided me. My nearly bald scalp was littered with scabs. The little hair I had was growing back in uneven patches. The most alarming feature was my prominent cheek bones.

Where was the vicious person that had fought against all odds to survive the cruel and unforgiving arena? Where was the fire behind the eyes that had seen unspeakable acts? She had been replaced by this emaciated ghost of a person. I didn't recognise myself at all.

The mirror didn't live to see my face again. I sat cross legged on my bed, picking the shards of glass out of my hands. The numbing effect of the morphling stopped me from feeling the pain of the cuts completely.

Days were a blur. Most of the time was spent sedated or sleeping. Without fail the dumb fucking nurses came and dragged me to the tub. I anticipated the shocks every time the water touched my skin. It was like a switch was being flipped in my brain. I had no control over my body as I slashed wildly at the people holding me down. I didn't remember details about the baths they forced me to take, but I did remember the intense fear and panic.

Katniss also stopped visiting me now. I was glad for it though. The look of pity in her eyes every time she saw me was worse than the loneliness of this God forsaken ward. I had been alone for a long time so did I care that I was alone now?

My hair was growing back little by little. The shadow of who I used to be started to come back. I was harbouring a lot of anger, according to the head doctor I had started seeing. No fuck I was harbouring anger. It was all I felt since I was ripped out of relative normalcy and my life became a public affair.

They started to cut my morphling down. Physically, I didn't need it. Mentally, I couldn't do without it. My dreamless sleep was replaced with thrashing, screaming and terrifying nightmares. Her face still found me in my dreams and was by far the worst thing. The dark rings around my eyes were permanent features and my inability to eat properly ensured that my body was always weak.

Haymitch came to see me one day to tell me about what had happened to Peeta. My head doctor had assured him that I could now handle it. He told me about tracker jacker venom and brain washing that they had put him through. In return for his information I decided I could tell him about what they had done to me. I didn't give him many details but there were flashes of shock across his face.

After telling Haymitch about what had happened, the nurses had stopped coming to drag me to the bath. Their eyes were full of pity and they sighed and shook their heads when they thought I wasn't looking. I was so sick of this fucking shit. When a nurse came to ask me if I was doing okay for the twelfth time in the last 10 minutes, I finally lost it.

Ripping the tubes out of my arm, I pushed my way through the doors of the ward and stormed out. I wandered around for a while in the catacomb-like rabbit warren until I found an empty room. I sat with my back against the wall, hidden behind a desk, and silently cursed everyone who had had anything to do with the outcome of these events.

I cursed myself for being selfish and not even asking about how the revolution was going, or even how their precious Mockingjay was. But at the end of the day, they had abandoned me just as equally as I had abandoned them.

The door opened as the thump of heavy footsteps played a prelude to annoyed muttering. I stayed quiet, hoping that I wouldn't be found out. I peered over the edge of the desk and saw a tall and well built man pacing up and down in the room he thought was empty. His eyes flickered in my direction and before I could duck behind the table again he called out. "Who's there?"

I stood up, in my hospital gown and started walking for the door. "Nobody important." I muttered. He stood in front of me, blocking my path. He held out his hand to me in greeting. "Gale Hawthorn." I took his hand begrudgingly. "Johanna Mason. Don't worry, I was just leaving." He looked at me curiously. "I can't believe I didn't recognise you." He started. "I watched you in the arena with Katniss. You look different."

I laughed sarcastically. "Different? No shit." He chuckled slightly. "You don't have to leave you know. I hide in here sometimes too." It was the first time someone looked at me as a person and not as a kicked puppy. I sat on the edge of the desk. "Thanks." I said and stared at my feet.

Gale filled me in on a few things that were happening in District 13. Things like the propos and plans for invading the Capitol. I stared at my feet the whole time he spoke. When I looked up at his face, I almost fell off the desk in horror.

I think it may have been a combination of morphling withdrawal and sleeplessness but his grey eyes were now hazel. The same fiery hazel eyes that I had fallen into moments before I had kissed Iris. I pushed my way past him and ran out of the door, tears falling freely, and ignored the shouts that echoed behind me.


	14. Chapter 14

Johanna POV

Gale's hand trailed up my leg and I pushed him away with both hands. His lips tore away from mine and he looked at me, his features pulled into this annoying smirk. "What the fuck, Johanna?" Gale crossed his arms over his chest. I was tired of him pushing his luck with me.

Gale and I had a relationship of convenience. He would seek me out every time he was rejected by Katniss and I would comply for the sake of human closeness. My depression was silent and my self-hatred grew every time his lips touched mine, but for a moment, I would see Iris's eyes in his and I could fall into a numb existence.

"You know where I draw the line." I headed for the door of the empty room we had met in. He groaned and threw his hands up in the air. "What is it with the fucking women around here?" I froze and turned back to look at him. "Well if you stopped trying to get into the pants of the murderous and psychologically damaged ones then you may have a chance. Until then, I make the rules on how we do this."

I stormed off and headed back to my ward. My hands shook from the effects of the morphling withdrawal and I felt sick more often than not. I had been stealing morphling from the medical supply closet almost daily. I couldn't stand the weight of the guilt of my actions concerning Gale. I wanted to get better, but I also didn't want to feel anything anymore.

The doctors told me it was a good idea to be moved out of the ward. After not seeing Katniss for weeks, I was surprised that she had offered to room with me. Our meeting was only by chance of course. She had been wheeled into the ward after being shot in District 2. The bullet hadn't even touched her, but the force was big enough to rupture her spleen.

She had been recovering when I spotted the beautiful clear liquid that was hooked up to her IV. I couldn't resist tapping into it, even though it weighed heavily on my conscience. She didn't seem to mind, so we shared the morphling. It was soon after that that Katniss had offered to share a compartment.

I didn't envy her for the attention she was getting. It affected her more than she let on. Peeta wasn't getting much better and had tried to kill her on more than one occasion. She also had to start training again when she was recovered. "Don't you think that you should start training too?" Katniss said to me one night in the ward. I huffed and turned over. "Go to sleep."

"I'm serious. Finnick is also training to raid the Capitol." I groaned. "Fine. Whatever, Brainless. Can I please get some sleep now?" She was silent from then on, but we both knew I wasn't going to be sleeping. I kept her awake many nights with screams from both the withdrawal and the nightmares I had of Iris.

We finally moved into a compartment. Katniss and I were not friends, but forced allies. I knew I would still die for her for the sake of the cause. The idea of death became more appealing as the morphling left my system begging for more. I had started to train with Katniss at a low level. Being a victor of the Hunger Games couldn't even prepare a person for the intensity of the training.

I often received help from Katniss when my hands shook too much to assemble my weapon. We quizzed each other on military tactics in our free time. I was starting to feel almost human again. Finnick also came to visit me again now that I was out of the ward. He told me that he and Annie were going to get married. I put on my happy face for him, but felt a deep pang of jealousy over what they had.

Gale came to see me more often too. Peeta was getting a little better so Katniss was again 'neglecting him.' "We have to stop this Gale." I said to him, stopping him before his lips could attack me in his usual lusty manner. "It doesn't mean anything Johanna. We agreed on this because it doesn't mean anything. Wasn't that the point?"

I sighed and ran my fingers through my hair. It was getting longer now, just brushing over the tops of my ears. "Exactly. It means nothing, so we should stop. I have to focus on training now." The truth was that I couldn't cope with the guilt now that there was no morphling in my system. He over-turned the desk in anger and started cursing. I just left the room without another word.

I started to become more focussed on training, reasoning out that I would be a shield for Katniss if it came to that. I wasn't afraid of dying anymore. If I died in this war, I'd find Iris again, and the people that inherit the world after we are gone will never have to live in fear of being reaped.

My morphling withdrawal was now over, but the addiction never went away. I'd find myself craving it when things started to get bad. I'd dream about the war; going into the Capitol and killing snow with my bare hands. I'd also dream about dying in the war and finding myself at complete peace with the world. I clung to those dreams like lifelines as I ran through the rain that felt like acid on my skin.

I held onto the thoughts of Snow's warm blood, running over my hands when I buried my axe in his skull.


	15. Chapter 15

Johanna POV

I screamed as the needle went back into my arm. The panic that over took me after my training exam was as intense as it was in the prison in the bowels of the Capitol. I was soaked through my uniform and my skin crawled with the sensation of the electricity that I was anticipating.

The shock and panic would subside, but the feeling of having failed in the one duty I had was lasting. My only chance at killing Snow and avenging the people I loved that he had killed was washed away with the water that they had almost drowned me in.

I was sedated for a few days, just to make sure I wasn't going to have a break down and punch any more nurses. The self hatred that I was letting go of to replace with focus on my training was avalanching back into the pit of my stomach. It burned my chest and left me feeling empty.

Finnick's life would carry on. He was now married to Annie and nothing could destroy their happiness. Katniss was focussed on the war and was being filmed in every free minute she had. I was left alone here again to rot in this underground hell hole.

It proved once again that caring about nothing was better. I was contemplating finding some morphling in the medical supply closet. Three syringes should do the trick. The potent drug would overpower my heart and I'd drift off silently.

My thoughts were interrupted by scrambling outside the ward. There were people running passed and a red warning light was flashing in the hallway. "What's going on?" I asked to a nearby nurse. "It's a perimeter warning I think. Probably a false alarm again. It happens occasionally." I sat up in my bed.

"What perimeter warning?" I asked her curiously. "It's a barrier of sensors that surround District 13." She began. "They basically go off if anything comes inside the perimeter so we aren't caught off guard if we're attacked. It's probably another animal that set it off like last time."

Katniss POV

There was a line of soldiers, including the victors that were waiting with guns cocked and aimed at the forest surrounding District 13. I was informed that it may be a false alarm, as it had happened a couple of times in the past. We couldn't take any chances considering the current state of the war that was going on, so we were out in full force, prepared for an attack.

My heart pounded in my chest with the increased levels of adrenalin. My gun was pointed at a spot in the trees as we all waited silently.

There was soft rustling in a shrub, just across from where we were standing. I held my breath.

A single person came stumbling out of the trees; female by the looks of it. She was clutching her side and was covered in dirt from head to toe. Her skeletal frame shocked me and I lost concentration for a moment. "Identify yourself." Someone called put to her. Guns were trained onto the trees, anticipating more people to reveal themselves.

The figure stumbled and fell to her knees. Her eyes scanned the lines of soldiers and finally locked onto mine. Her mouth moved by no words were audible. I strained my eyes to get a better look at her. She looked straight at me and mouthed "Katniss."

Before I knew it I was pushing through lines of soldiers; elbowing my way through them to get to the tree line. Angry shouts of "Stay back!" and "Don't break rank" reached my ears, but I brushed them off. I fell on my knees beside the girl as she collapsed into my arms.

"Someone get help!" I yelled to the front line. My hand stroked the girl's face. Her hazel eyes looked up into mine and her hand clutched the front of my uniform. "It's okay, Iris." I stroked her matted hair and pulled her against my chest. Her face was radiating so much heat that even through my uniform I could feel it. She had a bad fever and seemed to be badly hurt.

A stretcher arrived and she was loaded onto it. She reluctantly let go of my shirt and I could see she was battling to stay conscious. I took her hand and jogged alongside the stretcher. "We've got you Iris. You're safe now." With that, her eyes closed and she was carried underground. I stood outside the entranced to District 13; speechless.

I looked down at my hands. A mixture of dirt and blood soiled them. I wiped them off quickly on my uniform. A hand rested on my shoulder. "Are you okay?" Finnick's voice was delicate, but he couldn't mask the shakiness behind it. I shook my head as tears escaped my eyes. "She was supposed to be dead."

Finnick's arms encircled me and he rubbed my back in soothing circles. "We left her behind Finnick." I cried against his chest. "We didn't even make sure before we left her." He took my face in his hands and made me look at him. "No one could have known, Katniss." He guided me down the entrance into the District.

My God, what have we done?


	16. Chapter 16

Johanna POV

It wasn't long before the red lights stopped flashing and there was more commotion outside of the ward. A handful of people ran passed my ward wheeling a gurney along. I craned my head to try and see outside the door but they were gone before I could see anything.

"What's going on?" I asked the nurse as she walked back into my ward. "They found someone coming out of the woods. Looks to be in bad shape too." I got out of my bed and walked to the door, but the nurse ushered me back. "Johanna you need to rest." That look of pity was back in her eyes.

I pushed my way passed her and stripped off my hospital gown. I pulled on a shirt and pair of pants. "I'm going to check it out." I announced. The nurse stood in the door way. "Don't make me sedate you again." She held a needle in her hand. Movement behind the nurse caught my attention. Finnick was standing with his arm around Katniss, who looked distraught.

Finnick's eyes met mine and then widened. He spoke animatedly to Katniss but I couldn't hear what he had said. Katniss ran down the hallway and Finnick slid the glass ward door open. "How's it going Johanna?" He asked me, trying to mask the urgency in his tone. I folded my arms across my chest. "Spit it out Finnick. What was that about?"

He cleared his throat and rubbed his palms together, looking at them like they would magically produce an answer for him. When he finally looked at me again, his mouth opened but he couldn't seem to make any words come out. A doctor pushed passed him and looked at the nurse. "Get an ice bath ready. We need to try and get that fever down or she won't make the night."

Finnick looked panicked for a second and then grabbed my shoulders. "I didn't want to tell you that I knew what went on in the arena with you and..." His eyes were full of concern. "Come on Finnick. Fucking out with it already." I pulled his hands off of my shoulders. He sighed deeply. "She's in bad shape, Jo. If anyone had known we would have looked for her but you had said she didn't make it and..." Before he could continue, I knocked him onto his back and ran out of the ward.

My heart was racing and I was feeling dizzy as my bare feet pounded the floor. I skid to a halt outside the ward that had the most people around it. I pushed my way to the front, ignoring Finnick's calls behind me.

My hands covered my mouth in shock. There was a girl lying on the gurney. The doctors had cut open her shirt to expose her torso. There were three massive parallel lacerations that extended from her left hip right up to the right side of her rib cage. The cuts oozed blood and other foul smelling fluids.

The girl was barely conscious; her eyes flickered open and closed and her pupils were dilated to the max. The room started to spin and arms encircled me from behind. I fought against them to get to her. My hand touched hers before I was lifted off of my feet by Finnick. Iris's unique hazel eyes stared straight into mine. I felt sick at how fragile and afraid she looked.

I struggled against Finnick's arms. "Let me go! Let me go!" I yelled, managing to land a blow to Finnick's stomach. The impact caused him to loosen his grip and I slipped out of his arms. My hand reached out for Iris's but before I made contact, my vision went black and my body hit the floor.

Katniss POV

I stood and watched from the door. It was over in seconds when one of the doctors had finally managed to sedate Johanna. She was being carried back off to her ward. Finnick shook his head and touched his swollen, bleeding lip with the back of his hand.

"Finnick..." I started. He held his hand up to silence me. "Not here." He led me to an empty waiting room and we both sat down. "What was that about? I've never seen Johanna like that before." I asked him. I had calmed down from earlier, feeling better that Iris was being treated now. He sighed and pushed his hands through his hair in frustration. "When we were in the arena, I saw something. I'm not sure I should be telling you because I didn't know what it meant until Johanna freaked out in there."

"I don't understand Finnick." He nodded once and rested his elbows on his knees. "I saw Johanna and Iris in the arena." He began. "I've known Johanna for a few years now. Hell, we've been sending kids off to the slaughter together since she won her games. I've never seen her look at anyone the way she looked at Iris. Her reaction confirmed what I thought. I didn't realise how much Johanna cared for Iris until now."

I pondered what he was saying for a few moments. "So you're saying..." He nodded once. I sighed and held my head in my hands. "Poor Johanna." The girl had been through so much trauma with being tortured by the Capitol, and now one of the few people she cared about was back from the dead and on the verge of death again.

"What do we do?" I asked him, feeling defeated. "I don't know Katniss. I really don't know." I stood and walked to look through the viewing window in Iris's ward. The doctors were cleaning the gaping wounds on her abdomen and administering a multitude of medications to her. Nurses were hurrying about, bringing this and that on the doctors' commands.

I decided to sit with Johanna while they worked on Iris. I sat on the edge of her bed. The nurse had restrained her hands and ankles in case she woke up in a panic and hurt herself in the process. I looked at Johanna properly for the first time. she wasn't angry looking, or violent in this moment. Her eyes were closed and slightly creased around the edges. Tear tracks still stained her face, even in her unconscious state.

I wiped the almost dried tears from her cheeks with my thumb. I couldn't help but feel a pang of guilt for what I had done to this girl. She would still be home safely in District 7 if I had just eaten those berries when I had the chance. Peeta wouldn't be suffering with his hijacking visions and Finnick could be living in relative happiness with his new wife.

What's done is done now. I vowed that I would kill Snow and end all this suffering. I swear it now for Johanna and for Finnick, for Annie and for Peeta. I swear it for everyone whose lives were lost to save mine. I would end this for the people I cared about.


	17. Chapter 17

Johanna POV

Katniss was sitting on the chair next to my bed and her head rested on my leg. "Katniss." I called out softly, pulling against the restraints. Her eyes opened and she sat up straight. "I fell asleep. Sorry." She rubbed her eyes and yawned. "Are you okay?" She asked me with what looked like genuine concern. I nodded and looked at my wrists.

Katniss's hands fumbled with the restraints and undid them one by one. "You shouldn't do that. You'll get in trouble." She walked over to my small cupboard and pulled out a set of clothes for me. "Fuck getting in trouble. What will they do to me?" She said putting the clothes on my lap. "Get dressed."

I sat up and pulled the clothes on. Katniss took my hand with a knowing look on her face. "Come on." She led me out of the ward. I was almost certain she could hear my heartbeat echoing off of the walls with each step we took. "Go and see her. I'll keep watch."

I walked slowly into the ward. There was a white curtain pulled around her bed. "Iris." I called out as softly as I could. There was no reply, so I pulled the curtain aside slowly, peering through the gap. She was hooked up to a few IVs and a heart rate monitor. Her eyes were closed and she looked to be sleeping peacefully.

I stood beside her bed, trying to regulate my own heart rate. My hand trembled as I reached out to brush a strand of hair from her face. Her hair was short now; the edges of it were jagged and uneven, almost touching her shoulders. The heat that was still radiating off of her skin was alarming.

She was so thin that I felt sick looking at her prominent ribs. Her torso was wrapped in a white dressing, exposing parts of her rib cage and her right hip bone. My hands trembled uncontrollably as I reached out and lay my hand over hers. Small tear drops left marks on the white hospital sheets as I leaned my forehead against the bed next to her.

"I'm so sorry Iris." I whimpered and gripped the sheets with my free hand. There were footsteps coming from the hall. I lifted her frail hand to my lips before replacing it next to her and walking out of the curtained off bed.

A nurse was standing on the other side of the curtain and her eyes widened at seeing me. "Who let you out of your restraints?" I just shook my head and walked away. I wasn't in the mood for a fight; not here, not today. The nurse's hand rested on my shoulder, stopping me from leaving. Her eyes were sympathetic and she nodded to the chair next to Iris's bed. "Stay."

I sat down on the chair and held my head in my hands. "We're going to be waking her up for another ice bath." The nurse told me as she checked all the IVs and scribbled something on a clipboard. "Her fever is coming down a bit. She had a bad infection from the cuts, but she's gonna be fine." She smiled gently at me and left the ward, calling back to me: "You should stay and let her know you're here. She was looking for you during the night."

My heart skipped a little at this news. She was looking for me. I stroked her face gently with the back of my hand, the memories of our short encounter flashing passed my eyes as clear as day. It was still like I was walking through a dream. The realisation was starting to sink in that she was alive.

A doctor pulled back the curtain, not even acknowledging my presence. The nurse must have told him that I was here. He looked at the clipboard and checked the monitors. I watched him as he scribbled something down in silence and pulled a syringe from his pocket. He pulled the cap off with his teeth and inserted the needle into the IV line, pushing the plunger and walking away without a word.

It only took seconds for Iris's eyes to flutter open. She scanned the room quickly, her eyes adjusting to the light. My heart raced as I cupped her cheek gently with my hand. "H..hey." I cursed myself for sounding so weak. A smile played on her lips, even though I could see her grimace through the pain.

"Johanna." My name sounded so right coming from her lips. "How are you feeling?" My voice was shaking more than my hands. Her hand found mine and steadied it. She shrugged weakly and her free hand traced the side of my face. "I've been worse." Her voice was raspy and tired.

"What did I tell you about shrugging being so impersonal." I said trying to sound annoyed at her. She chuckled softly as if no time was lost between us. Her thumb wiped away tears that were falling freely now. "I thought you were d..." Her finger pressed to my lips before I could finish. "I'm here now." I pressed my forehead to hers and a sob escaped my lips.

My attention was pulled away by the same nurse as earlier. "Ah, you're awake dear." She had brought a wheel chair and some kind of plastic bandaging with her. "This is just so the wounds don't get wet okay?" The nurse started wrapping the waterproof bandage over the cotton bandage that was in place. Iris's hand held onto mine as if it were a lifeline.

I helped the nurse get her into the wheel chair from the bed. The nurse unhooked the monitor. "Sorry Johanna. I'll bring her back in a while. We have to get this fever down, so she's going to the ice bath." Iris's hand was like a vice grip. I squeezed it gently. "I'll be here when you get back okay?" Her land loosened around mine. "Promise?" her voice was shaky. "Promise."

I pressed my lips to her hand briefly before she was wheeled out of the ward.

A/N: Thanks for the support. I know the wait was agonising but they are finally reunited. Apologies to the people who were put off by the depressing nature of the story. I was trying to capture the emotions in a realistic way. Thanks for sticking it out. Much love!


	18. Chapter 18

Iris POV

I sat in the cold bath, shivering slightly. My fever was still intense, so the cold brought it down to a less dangerous temperature. The doctors told me that the medication fought the pyrogen so I should be back to normal relatively soon.

The wounds on my abdomen were still of concern to everyone and presented me with a lot of pain. I wasn't allowed any extreme pain killers or I may have a bad reaction, so I just had to grit my teeth until it healed.

Given everything that was wrong with me, I was feeling safe for the first time in weeks. There was so much I needed to tell Johanna that I couldn't in the arena. I was confused by the way my body gravitated toward her. I've never experienced this with anyone before.

The nurse finally let me out of the bath. She helped me dry off and then wheeled me back to my ward. I was slightly disappointed to find it empty though. I was helped back into my bed and my IV was reattached.

"Are you feeling any better?" Johanna was standing in the doorway. I smiled involuntarily and sat up in my bed a little. "Better now that you're back." I said. After the words left my mouth I wanted to slap myself. I sounded so stupid.

A grin appeared on Johanna's face as she approached the bed. Her hair was much shorter than in the arena and she was in a hospital gown. "Why are you wearing that?" I asked, catching a glimpse of the band on her wrist. 'Mentally unstable' stood out in bold letters.

She sat down and fiddled with the band. "Ah you know. Just trying to make a fashion statement." I raised my eyebrow but didn't say anything further. There was a kind of empty space that lay between us. Empty, but at the same time full of questions and unspoken words that neither of us knew how to say.

"I like your hair." I said softly, taking her hand. She scoffed and ruffled her spikey locks. "I could win contests with this look." I laughed and ran my fingers through it without thinking. Johanna froze and pulled back a little. "I..I'm sorry." I pulled my hand back, but she took it in hers. "You have no reason to be sorry. It's still so unreal that you're here."

"I should probably tell you what happened." I subconsciously played with her fingers. "You don't have to Iris. Not if you aren't ready to." Her eyes were filled with concern. "I want to." I said, adjusting the pillow behind my back. I flinched a little at the action.

"I'm not sure, exactly, what happened." She sat silently and listened. "I heard that beast come up behind us in the arena, so I pushed you out of the way and was carried off. Its claws obviously got the better of me." I looked at my bandaged abdomen.

"It wasn't even seconds after that that it disappeared into thin air. There was a kind of bright light and then I hit the ground; no beast in sight." Johanna nodded. "Katniss short circuited the arena. Because the whole arena is basically a computer programme, it must have caused the beast to disappear." Johanna said.

"That makes sense I guess." I said. Johanna's eyes were fixed on her feet, trying to hide the tears that were building up in her eyes. I touched her chin and lifted her face, wiping a stray tear. "You don't get to feel guilty for this, Johanna. There was no way you could have known. I was just so happy to see that District 13 got you out in time. After that, the blood loss made me lose consciousness, because when I woke up, it was morning." Johanna shook her head and rested her forehead against her fist.

I took her hand in mine and unfurled her fist. "What is it?" I asked her. She was fighting back tears again. "It was a Capitol hovercraft." At first I was confused and then her words sunk in. My eyes widened and I gasped softly, my hand covering my mouth. She shrugged and wiped away the tears building up. "I was rescued eventually and brought here."

"Did they hurt you?" I asked after a few moments of silence. She hesitated. "Nothing I couldn't handle." She would tell me when she was ready. "I thought you were dead, Iris. If I had known, if I could, I would have been in that arena looking for you." My hand cupped her cheek. "I know Johanna. It isn't your fault." Tears were flowing freely now and she leaned into my hand.

I waited for her to calm down before continuing. "I managed to cut my tracker out before the Capitol could find me." I showed Johanna the long jagged scar on my left forearm. "And I basically started walking until I got back here." She sucked in a deep breath. "You walked all this way?" She asked. "Yeah. It took longer than I thought. I was starting to get pretty sick and I hadn't eaten in a while. I was glad to see Katniss or else I would never have found District 13's entrance."

We sat in silence for a bit. Johanna looked as if she was trying to process everything I had told her. I spent the time memorising her face. She had a subtle scar above her right eyebrow, and one on the angle of her jaw. There was another scar that started at the corner of her left eye and extended upwards, disappearing under her hair.

My fingers ghosted over the scar and then gently ran through her hair again. She didn't pull away, but her eyes were trained on the ground. Johanna cleared her throat and asked: "What happened to your hair?" I laughed a little and shook my head. "It was getting in the way when I was travelling here. I had a knife from the arena so I just kind of sliced it off. I didn't do a good job of it either."

She giggled a bit at this. "I can cut it for you if you like. I used to cut my brothers' hair all the time." A realisation struck me that this was the first time that I actually knew anything personal about Johanna. I wanted to know everything about her, but I was so afraid to ask about her past. "I'd love that." I smiled at her.

Johanna got up and looked through some of the drawers and closets in the ward, pulling out a pair of scissors. She grinned and held them up like a trophy. I couldn't help but laugh at the expression on her face. She helped sit up and I swung my legs over the edge of the bed, giving her a better angle to cut my hair.

Her hands were steady and sure as she straightened out my uneven ends, starting at the back and working her way around. She took a step back and put her hand on her chin as if she was admiring a painting. "All done." She picked up a metal tray, that I assumed was for holding medical instruments, and held it up so I could see my reflection. My hair was even throughout and looked amazing.

"Thank you, Johanna." I said, grinning at her work. She smiled back and put the tray down again. She ran her fingers through my hair and ruffled it up a little. "It looks good if you mess it up a little." I got goosebumps from the feeling of her hands in my hair.

Her fingers ran through it once more, stopping at the nape of my neck. My breath hitched in my throat and Johanna's deep brown eyes locked onto mine. My heart raced and I swallowed the lump in my throat.

Johanna stepped closer to me, her nails grazing gently down the back of my neck. Goosebumps travelled from where her fingers touched, right down to my toes. My hand cupped her cheek and I could almost feel her breath on my face. I inched my face closer to hers, stopping millimetres away from her lips.

Johanna closed the distance and kissed me. Her lips were slightly chapped but incredibly soft. Her fingers tangled in my hair and hand moved from her face to her waist, pulling her a little closer. The pain from my abdomen was gone, and the hurt and worry from the last few weeks melted away as I melted into Johanna's lips.


	19. Chapter 19

Johanna POV

Falling asleep was easier knowing Iris was only down the hall. Finnick had come to visit both of us nearly every day. Annie would come along with him on some days. Katniss was still very busy with propos so she would see us when she had a spare minute here or there.

I found myself smiling far more than I ever had, even before the Games. My life had been so empty before Iris, but now everything felt easy. We spent a lot of time talking on her hospital bed. The nurses would have to almost drag me out of her ward.

The doctors were satisfied that I didn't need to remain hospitalised, so I was allowed to go and stay in my compartment with Katniss again. I was disappointed that I was further away from Iris, but it didn't stop me spending as much time as I could with her. I wasn't sure if Katniss suspected anything going on between Iris and I but I didn't care. I was so fucking happy that I could burst.

"Where's your favourite place in the world?" Iris asked me. We were sitting on her bed and her hands were absentmindedly playing with the hem of my shirt. "Well, there was a place I used to go in District 7 that was pretty cool. There's a little waterfall a few miles away from my house. I used to take my brothers there to swim."

"Maybe you can show me when this is all over." My chest tightened at the thought of swimming in the waterfall. I swallowed and forced a smile, trying to hide my anxiety. "Sure. I'll show you." I had to start facing my fear of water sooner or later. Her eyes were silently questioning me, but she didn't say anything.

"Tell me about your family." I traced the freckles on her arm. "Well," Iris started, "it was only me and my parents. They died during my games. It was supposed to be an accident but everyone in my district knew that it was planned." I sighed. "My family was killed by the Capitol too. I came home to a pile of ashes and three body bags."

"You mentioned you had brothers." Iris's fingertips were running up and down the side of my neck and shoulder, raising goosebumps in their wake. I nodded. "Two brothers; both were younger than me. My mom died when I was just a kid, so my dad raised me and my brothers. He taught me everything I know."

Iris's fingers ran through my hair slowly. She seemed to like doing this so I didn't object. She also seemed to like tracing over the multitudes of scars that I have. It was as if she was memorising each one. I was self conscious about them at first, but I was getting used to her touching them.

Her hand returned to her lap and she plucked at a loose thread on her hospital gown. "Johanna?" she seemed nervous. "Yes Iris?" She drew a breath and let it out slowly. "What happened to you in the Capitol?" My heart started beating faster. I knew she would have to find out sooner or later. "Do you think we can talk about it tomorrow?" I looked at her apologetically.

"Sure. I mean, you don't have to tell me if you don't want to." I took her face in my hands and leaned my forehead against hers. "I want you to know everything about me, and I want to know everything about you. I'll tell you everything tomorrow." I touched my lips to hers.

Her hands snaked up my back and she moved closer to me, her fingers scratching at the nape of my neck. She kissed me with more force than she had before. I deepened the kiss and ran my tongue over her bottom lip. Her breathing was more shallow and her hands travelled down my arms and then found their way to my hips. She broke the kiss and started to trail kisses down my neck. I closed my eyes and tilted my head back, biting my lip.

"Am I interrupting?" We both froze and then quickly rectified ourselves. Katniss was standing by the entrance, her eyebrow raised. "Uh... no its okay. What's up?" I said, clearing my throat. Katniss walked in and sat on the chair next to the hospital bed. "I wanted to come say goodbye and thank you for helping me with the training."

"Goodbye?" I said, sitting up straighter. Katniss sighed. "We're going to the Capitol tomorrow." My stomach sank. The floods of happiness I was feeling had dried up instantly. It was almost unreal at how quickly the time had passed and now my friends were going off to fight in a war. "It's not goodbye." Iris pitched in. "You'll be back when everything is over." No one could be sure of that.

Katniss hugged us both and made her way to the door. "Make him pay, Katniss." I said to her. She turned and looked over her shoulder. "He'll pay. Don't worry." She smiled half heartedly and walked out.

I kissed Iris on the forehead and got up. "I need to go and find Finnick." I walked out of the ward and down the hall way. I went to Finnick's compartment and knocked on his door. Annie opened it, her eyes red and moist. I pulled her into a quick hug, which I think took her aback, because she didn't hug me back.

"Is Finnick around?" I asked her. "He's at a meeting with Pultarch and Coin. They're discussing the invasion plan I think." She looked very distraught, although I knew I would be too if the roles were reversed. "Thanks Annie." I hugged her again, which she returned and then I walked down the hall. I was turning soft. Hugging was something I never did, but now I was hugging everyone.

I ran smack dab into Finnick when I turned a corner. "Ouch. It's like running into a brick wall." I said clutching my nose and checking if it was bleeding. He laughed and apologised. "I wanted to come see you off." I said, trying to mask the fear in my voice. "Thanks. I'll see you when I get back okay?" He said, also looking concerned.

He pulled me into a hug and I threw my arms around his neck. "Keep an eye on Annie for me?" I nodded and let go of him. "I'll make sure she stays safe. I promise." He smiled gratefully and then walked towards his compartment. I decided to go back to the one I shared with Katniss. It was empty.

I flung myself onto my bed and buried my face in my pillow. If there was any power out there, I prayed to it to bring my friends back safely when everything was over.


	20. Chapter 20

Iris POV

Johanna and I sat in front of the screens in one of the meeting rooms in District 13. There was an announcement a few days ago that the Star Squad (the group of victors basically) had been killed, but no bodies had been recovered. The news was terrifying, but deep down I knew that they were okay.

Johanna's fingers were laced through mine and her knuckles were starting to turn white from squeezing so hard. I didn't mind though. It kept her from breaking down in that moment. She was leaning against my side, which was a bit painful, but bearable.

The medication the doctors had been giving me had helped a lot with the wounds on my abdomen. They were starting to form pink scar tissue around the edges of the jagged cuts. I was in far less pain, which made moving around much easier.

Annie wasn't permitted into the meeting room with us. Haymitch and Plutarch had broken the news to her in private. She wasn't taking it well, so they agreed that it was better if she was placed into hospital under light sedation.

We took a break from the screens to go and visit her. I was surprised to see her awake. She was staring blankly at the wall in the ward, muttering softly to herself. "Hey Annie." Johanna said, bringing Annie's attention away from the wall. "How are you feeling?" Her eyes were clear and she seemed more level headed than I expected.

"I'm pregnant." My mouth fell open at the news and Johanna gasped softly. "That's great Annie." I could hear the concern in Johanna's voice. Annie smiled gently and lay her hand on her stomach. "I found out today." She was straining to keep her voice calm. "Finnick would have been so happy."

My heart sank. Johanna sat on the edge of her bed and lay her hand over Annie's. They sat in silence for a while. "We'll leave you to rest Annie." Johanna said finally. "I'll come and keep you updated." She smiled at Annie and squeezed her hand.

The transformation I had seen in Johanna was staggering. She had changed from a cold hearted and vicious person into such a caring and gentle one. We returned to the meeting room and sat down on a sofa in front of the television again.

"Do you think they're really dead?" Johanna said, taking my hand. I shook my head. "They would have found bodies by now. It's been days since the incident so they would have found something by now." Johanna let out the breath she was holding. "I sure hope they're okay."

I kissed Johanna's forehead and leaned my head on her shoulder. Johanna had still not told me about what happened in the Capitol. I didn't mention it with everything that was going on, but I wanted to know. I wanted to understand her pain. I asked Haymitch, but he told me that Johanna should be the one to tell me.

"Will you tell me what happened to you in Capitol?" I sat up and looked her in the face. I had watched Johanna fall asleep a few times, and each time it was uneasy and wrought with dreams that affected her deeply. She'd wake up in a panic and I knew it had something to do with her imprisonment. Her breath hitched and she ran her fingers through her hair, nodding.

She turned away from me slightly and looked at the carpet. "They kept me in a cell in the Capitol." I watched her carefully, observing her face and body language. "Every day they would bring in a hose and douse my cell with water so there was no where that I could escape to within the cell." Her hands were starting to shake. "They shaved my head and then ran a wire into the cell and powered it, electrocuting me."

I felt tears roll down my cheeks. I'd kill them for hurting her. She took a shaky breath. "They did that every day for weeks. Peeta was in a cell next to mine and Annie was across the hall. They both had to listen to me scream every day, and I had to listen to them. I'm not sure if that was worse, or if the electricity was. But then they came and rescued us all."

I released the breath that I was holding and wiped the tears from my cheeks before Johanna could see them. "I haven't been able to cope with water yet. I'm trying to but it's hard. When I see it, my body freezes up." She clenched her fists. I lay my hand over hers. "I'll help you. We can get through it together." I said, giving her hand a light squeeze.

I guided Johanna's head down onto my lap and stroked her short hair. "Sleep. You must be exhausted." She closed her eyes and stayed with her head on my lap. She looked so vulnerable and drained. I leaned my head back and closed my eyes to block out the light of the television, still playing with Johanna's hair.

It only seemed like minutes that my eyes were closed before I was being shaken awake. My eyes shot open and I instinctively grabbed the wrist of whoever was doing the shaking. Haymitch pulled his arm away and sat on the couch. "You'll want to see this."

Johanna was already awake and was watching the television attentively. The headline read: 'Rebels triumph over Capitol and imprison Pres. Snow.' They did it. A grin spread across my face. "Is this real?" I asked, overjoyed. Haymitch smiled and nodded.

Johanna's eyes were solemn and she stared blankly at the screen. "Johanna?" I asked. She was quiet. I was getting concerned. "Johanna?" I repeated. She stood up and walked out. I ran after her and found her crouched in the hallway with her head in her hands. I draped my arm around her shoulders and pulled her to my chest.

"Finnick's dead." She choked out between tears. I gasped and pulled her into my arms. Finnick was one of the few people that Johanna had. He meant a lot to her. I pulled her as close to me as I could, ignoring the sting from my wounds. Her hand found the front of my shirt, twisting it in her fist as she cried.

"I've got you." I said softly as I held her. It was all over.


	21. Chapter 21

A/N: sorry for the long delay. I've just started varsity again and the beginning of a year is always hectic. Hope you enjoy the chapter!

Johanna POV

Iris's hands were in my hair, tugging it gently as our lips moved in perfect synchronisation. I pushed her gently against the wall of the empty room we were in. My body pressed up against hers, moulding into it as we were two pieces of a puzzle.

My hands found her waist and started snaking up under her shirt. Iris hesitated and inhaled through clenched teeth. I immediately pulled back. "Did I hurt you?" I asked, cupping her cheek. "No," she said firmly. I could tell she was lying though.

I took a step back to compose myself, but Iris stepped forward, her lips finding mine again. I kissed her back gently, and then slowly pushed her away. "I don't want to hurt you. Your cuts aren't fully healed yet." I said, even though I was dying to get close to her.

A red spot on her grey shirt caught my eye. It was slowly spreading through the material and growing in size. "Fuck." I muttered and dropped to my knees in front of her. The wounds must have reopened. I started lifting her shirt to assess the damage when Iris's hands tried to push mine away.

I caught a glimpse of the scabs and scars on her abdomen before her shirt covered them again. I looked up at her, her eyes panicked. "Don't." She whispered. It had been a few days since the news about Finnick and since the war had been 'won'. I was still trying to cope with the loss, but Iris had been there the whole way. She comforted and helped me. I needed to do the same.

"It's okay. I'm just gonna take a look to see how bad it is." I said, pulling up the hem of her shirt. Her hands took mine and stopped them. I looked up at her again. "I'll get one of the doctors to take care of it." She said, with an apologetic look on her face.

Iris was scared of what I was going to think about the scars. She had been avoiding the topic and never let me look at them. I had seen the lacerations when she was brought in from the woods, so I didn't understand what the big deal was.

"Why can't I look?" I asked her, standing up. I was about two inches taller than Iris. Her hazel eyes dances with a flurry of emotions. "They're ugly." She said flatly. I kissed her, pouring all the things I felt for her into the kiss.

"You're beautiful." I said quietly, bringing my hand up to the side of her neck. Her eyes closed and she leaned into my hand. "Let's get you fixed up." I said, taking her hand and leading her out of the empty room. We walked in silence to the hospital. The whole of district 13 was very tense after the attack on the Capitol.

Katniss wasn't doing so great from what I had overheard. She was in the Capitol, along with Peeta and Gale. The loss of her sister had sent Katniss into a downward spin. We were supposed to be flying in to the Capitol tomorrow to watch Snow be publicly executed. I can't say I was excited.

I wanted Snow dead with everything I had left of me. But now? Everything seemed so out of place. Like we were turning into him. It had to be, we all knew that, but would it really change anything?

We reached the hospital wards and got a doctor to look at Iris's wounds. I turned and left the ward so the doctor could attend to it. I didn't want to disrespect Iris's wishes. I leaned against the wall outside the ward and crossed my arms over my chest.

I was worried. I worried for Annie and her baby that was on the way. She needed someone to help protect and raise the kid. I had promised Finnick I would look out for her. I would never break my promise to him. I was also worried for the future.

What was going to happen now that it was all over? Now that everything we fought for had been accomplished. I sighed and leaned my head back against the wall.

Iris came around the corner a few moments later. "All fixed up." She announced. I smiled at her and straightened up. She smiled back and my heart did a little skip. She really was beautiful. "Let's go for a walk?" She suggested.

I looked at her blood stained shirt and back up to her face. "Let's get you a clean shirt first. I walked down to the sleeping compartments and Iris followed. I opened the door to the room Katniss and I had been sharing. I sighed and walked in.

I opened my drawer and pulled out one of my shirts. I handed it to Iris. "Uhm, Johanna." She began, holding up the shirt to examine it. "I do have clothes you know." The shirt was one of the few personal items I had that was brought back from district 7 for me. I doubted that I'd ever be going back there.

"I know." I began, "but it will look better on you anyway." Iris turned her back to me and took off her bloodied shirt, tossing it on the floor. I couldn't stop my eyes wandering over the contours of her back. Her muscles rippled slightly as she pulled my shirt over her head.

She turned and walked to me, kissing my cheek. "Thanks." She said with a smile. We walked out of the sleeping compartments and up towards the underground entrance to the district. We were allowed to walk outside now that there was no fear of being attacked.

Iris led me out into the forest and I breathed in the fresh air. It felt amazing to be outside again. We walked through the trees for a while, Iris's eyes scanned around. "Don't get over zealous." I said to her. "We might get lost."

She shook her head and kept walking. "I came through this way when I arrived her. I know where I'm going." I followed her in silence, breathing in the scent of pines and grass around me. The sky was clear and the breeze that was blowing cooled down the air. It was perfect.

"We're here." Iris announced, stopping at the edge of a clearing. There was a small lake in the centre of the clearing. I froze as Iris walked towards it and knelt down, dipping her hand in the water.

"Isn't it beautiful?" She asked, standing up and turning to face me. I swallowed back the lump in my throat. The clearing was beautiful, no doubt, but I think Iris had other intentions for coming here. She walked to me and took my hand, tugging me towards the lake.

"I won't let anything hurt you." She said, planting a chaste kiss on my lips. I followed her hesitantly. She slipped off her shoes and I did the same, walking to the edge of the water. I let go of her hand and took a step back. The fear of this body of water crept up my spine and made my body rigid.

Iris stepped towards me and put her hands on my waist. She stood up on her toes and kissed me. Her arms wrapped firmly around me and she pulled me as close as she could. My hands tangled in her shoulder length hair and tugged it.

I kissed her back, letting the thoughts of the water drift away and I focussed on her lips. Her kisses were getting more urgent now. Her body was pressed flush against mine and her hands were becoming braver. They slid under the hem of my shirt and rested on my hips, eliciting goosebumps in their wake.

She dragged her nails gently up my sides, lifting the shirt up with them. I moaned softly against her lips and scratched the nape of her neck. Her moan echoed mine as she pulled the shirt over my head. She tossed it aside and her hands immediately found my lower back.

She pulled away from the kiss slowly and looked into my eyes. I could get lost in those eyes. She smiled and ran her thumb over my bottom lip. "Take a look at the ground." She said, her smile turning into a grin. I looked down and noticed suddenly that my feet were in the water.

The water just covered the tops of my toes. It took a moment before it sunk in and I began to panic. I let go of Iris and scrambled out of the water, collapsing with my back against a tree. The memories started flooding back and I covered my ears with my hands and rocked back and forth slightly.

Iris approached me slowly and kneeled in front of me. Her eyes were full of concern and remorse. I shook my head. "No. Don't blame yourself." I said to her, trying to calm my heart rate. She cupped my cheek and pressed her forehead against mine, "I'm sorry. That was stupid of me."

I hated seeing Iris upset, so I did the only thing I could at that moment, and pulled her into my arms. I ignored everything I was feeling, because this girl was more important than any of that. Before I could stop myself, my mouth voiced what my mind was dying to say:

"I love you."


	22. Chapter 22

Iris POV

The train ride to the Capitol was filled with anxiety. Neither Johanna nor I wanted to be on this thing. The memories of our Games flooded back. I was anxious for what lay ahead in the Capitol. Although we all wanted Snow dead, seeing him publicly executed was harsh.

Johanna hadn't spoken to me much since the forest. She mostly sat in silence and wrung her hands as if she was about to be the one executed. I tried to get through to her, but nothing seemed to work.

I found Johanna sitting in the bar car of the train. She had a glass of brown liquid in her hand but she didn't seem present. Her eyes were focussed on one point on the opposite side of the car. I sat down opposite her and her eyes withdrew from the spot she was staring at and moved down to the floor.

"Talk to me," I looked at her, but her eyes didn't meet mine. "Please." I prompted. She took a swig from her glass and set it down on a glass top table beside her chair. "There's nothing to talk about." She said, getting up from her chair.

I stood up and closed the distance between us. "We're supposed to be in this together. I can't read your mind." I said, a little annoyed. Her brown eyes finally met mine, but they were glaring. "I don't even know what this is." She said, huffing and turning to walk away.

I grabbed her wrist and she stopped. "What's got you so bothered?" She turned, her eyes were softer, but the pain was radiating through them. "The way I feel about you scares me, okay?" She pulled her wrist out of my grasp.

"I've never been this open to anyone, apart from Finnick on the odd occasion. It's hard for me to open up, and when I do, all I get from you is silence." She was glaring again. "Is this because I didn't say I love you back?" I asked flatly.

Johanna threw her arms up in the air. "No." She started. "It's because I made a fool of myself thinking you might actually feel SOMETHING." She turned and walked out the door.

I followed her and caught up, placing my hands on her shoulders from behind. She tried to shrug them off but I slipped my arms around her waist, leaning my cheek against her back. She stopped and stood still.

"I've never known how to express myself," I began, swallowing and clearing my throat. "My parents weren't very affectionate people." She stayed quiet and unmoving. "My dad was a harsh man, and only wanted me to know how to take care of my mom when he died."

"My dad was a sick man for most of what I could remember as a child. He trained me to be able to take over his job when he was too sick to work. My mom worked in the power plant and he worked as security. We were always focussed on keeping each other alive more than on how we actually felt."

"I didn't even cry when I found out my parents had died in an accident at the power plant. I had been preparing myself for most of my life for my father's death, and with the stress of being in the arena I had become numb to everything."

Johanna relaxed a bit in my arms.

"When I met you, I behaved like I would around anyone else. I made a point of not getting close to anyone, so that I wouldn't have to hurt when I lost them." Johanna sighed and tried to pull out of my embrace, but I pulled her tighter against me.

"When I got to know you, I couldn't deny how I felt. You're beautiful and brave, and I love how you don't have a filter. You don't care what others think of you." I let go of her and stepped around her. I stood in front of her and took her hands.

"I care what you think about me." She said softly. "All the thoughts I have of you are good. I promise." I stroked Johanna's cheek and pressed my lips to her chin. "Just because I didn't know how to say it, doesn't mean I don't feel it."

"I love you too, Johanna. And I would do anything for you." I said, turning on my heel. I walked out of the door to my room. I sat down on the edge of the bed but before I had time to even process what I had just said, Johanna appeared out of nowhere.

Her lips found mine and her hands held either side of my face. She kissed me with such force and passion that I felt dizzy. I wrapped my arms around her neck and kissed her back. I pulled her as close to me as I could.

I lay back on the bed, pulling Johanna on top of me. Her hands wrapped around my back and with almost no effort, she hoisted me up and moved me further up the bed. I pulled her back down and crashed my lips against hers.

My hands ran up and down her back while her hands were on the bed on either side of my face, propping her up and supported her weight. I pulled her shirt up and tugged it over her head. Johanna complied and allowed me to pull it off.

When my fingertips touched her bare skin it was like an animal had awoken inside of me that wanted to be free. I flipped her over onto her back and straddled her. Her look of surprise was amusing and super attractive.

I used my new advantage to trail kisses down Johanna's neck. Her breathy moans spurred me on as my lips ventured further down. I peppered light kisses all along her collarbones and down her breast bone.

I felt her hands tugging on my own shirt and my breath hitched. The hesitation didn't last long and before I could blink, my shirt was on the floor next to hers. Johanna's nails sent goosebumps all the way up the back of my neck as they trailed down my spine, probably leaving marks in their wake.

Johanna's hands explored my back and slowly, almost hesitantly trailed around my rib cage. I inhaled as her fingertips traced lightly over the scars on my torso. The wounds were still a bit raw, and scabbed in places, but Johanna didn't hesitate and more. My lips pressed to hers again and I ran my tongue over her bottom lip.

Her hands stopped on my hips, and her lips parted slightly, allowing me to deepen the kiss. I pulled her bottom lip between my teeth and she moaned, her fingernails digging into my skin. Johanna's finger tips were now trailing along the waist band of my pants and stopped at the button.

Johanna's fingers fumbled for a moment, but then I felt the button pop open and her hands returned to my lower back. My heart was racing as I anticipated this magical experience with the woman I loved.

_Ding_

"The train has pulled into the Capitol station. All passengers please disembark." A voice from the intercom system pulled us both out of the moment. I groaned and buried my face in

Johanna's neck.

Johanna laughed and ran her fingers through my hair. "There will be plenty time for this later." She said. I kissed her once more before rolling off of her and sighing deeply. Well fuck.

Johanna and I both redressed ourselves and the mood had suddenly taken a dive. We walked out onto the platform hand in hand.

The tension was radiating off of Johanna and it was as if the emotions were experiencing in there had evaporated and risen up to join to the polluted air of the Capitol.


	23. Chapter 23

Johanna POV

We all sat around the table as Coin addressed us on a decision to be made. "What has been proposed is that in lieu of eliminating the entire Capitol population, we have a final, symbolic Hunger Games, using the children directly related to those who held the most power."

The vote had to be majority. So they needed 5 out of 8 to agree on going ahead with the Games. It was hard to believe that only 8 victors were still living. The rest had been killed either by the Capitol or by the rebels themselves.

My hand clutched tightly onto Iris's beneath the table.

"No!" Peeta burst out. "I vote no!"

I was angry at the whole damn lot of Capitol pricks that forced us into the arena and I wanted to see them pay. "Why not?" I said. "I vote yes." Iris's hand stiffened in mine.

"So do I." Enobaria spoke up. "They can have a taste of their own medicine."

"I vote no with Peeta," Annie said. "So would Finnick if he was here."

I was angry at her comment. "Snow killed him, so he's not here."

"No," said Beetee. "Unity is essential for survival."

The next thing shocked me more than anything. I knew Katniss was angry. I mean for Christ's sakes they killed her sister, but I never expected her to agree to this. "I vote yes...for Prim." She said.

Haymitch said soon after, "I'm with the Mockingjay."

Iris stared at her hands. The final decision rested with her now. They needed her to vote yes to agree to the Games.

"Iris." Coin said. "Your vote please." She was looking a bit impatient. A fire burned in her eyes that was unsettling.

"I vote no." Iris said. "Those kids don't deserve any of the things we went through. No one deserves that. We need to end this."

A look of frustration flashed over Coin's features, but she sighed and stood up. "So be it. We will not proceed with the Games."

We all left the table to prepare for the execution. Katniss was looking physically and emotionally ill. She stood, standing with a single arrow in her hand and sucked in a deep breath before walking outside.

The crowd of people that had gathered were cheering as Katniss entered onto the balcony in front of snow's mansion. She nocked the arrow in her bow and drew back the string, aiming directly at Snow.

I stayed close to Iris and I myself started to feel sick. I'd wanted nothing more than to see Snow die. But now it seemed wrong and inhumane. My eyes scanned over Coin. Her face was pulled into a menacing grin and I could see madness in those eyes.

Before I could blink again, she was toppling over the balcony with an arrow lodged into her.

Guards were surrounding Katniss now. She pulled at her pocket and held a small violet pill in her hand. Nightlock. She wanted to kill herself. I lunged towards her but Peeta beat me to it. The pill fell from her hand and the guards wrestled her off the balcony.

Iris's arms wrapped around me and we watched as they escorted Katniss into the mansion again. Snow was laughing and coughing up blood, tied to a chair. There was a stampede on the balcony as everyone went crazy at the Mockingjay's rash decision.

Iris's hand closed around my upper arm and pulled me into the mansion. I looked at her, my breathing was shallow and fast. "What the fuck just happened?" I asked her. She shook her head and started walking out of the door.

I caught up to her. "I need to get out of here Johanna." She said. I took her hand and sighed. "I need to stay and make sure Katniss is okay. God knows what they'll do to her.

"They won't hurt her." Peeta was standing in the shadows of the hallway nearby. "Fuck it!" I yelled. "Warn us next time." He walked out into the dim light of the hallway. "They won't do anything to her." He repeated. "She's traumatised. They'll see reason."

"I need to get out of here." Iris repeated. She looked at me almost pleadingly. "Iris, I need to make sure Katniss is going to be okay." Peeta hugged me briefly and then let go. I stiffened but hugged him back a bit. "Go." He said. "I'll contact you if you're needed. They won't let you near her anyway."

I nodded once slowly and put my hand on Peeta's shoulder. "Take care of her." He nodded and walked away. Iris and I headed out of the mansion. We were stopped once by Haymitch, who greeted us and told us to visit sometime.

We reached the train platform when I realised we didn't actually have a plan of action. "What do we do now?" I asked Iris. She kicked a pebble on the ground and put her hands in her pockets."We put the pieces of our lives back together I guess."

Annie was also escorted to the platform. She was dazed and muttering to herself. "You okay Annie?" I asked. She snapped out of her daze and looked at me. "I will be." She said, putting her hand on her stomach. "I'm going to see some family back in District 4. I got word that they managed to stay safe through everything."

I was relieved that Annie had someone to take care of her. "We'll come visit soon." Iris said and hugged her. Annie smiled and returned the hug. "We'll come see you in District 4. There are just a few things I need to get sorted out." I said, hugging Annie too.

She smiled and nodded as the train pulled toward the platform. We all boarded the train.

"What now?" Iris asked me. I didn't actually have a long term plan but there was one promise that I had to keep.

The ride to District 7 was short. It was one of the closest Districts to the Capitol. As the train pulled into District 7 I stood up and walked to the doors.

Iris followed me, without question. We left the train and it pulled off again, disappearing. I took a deep breath and walked toward my District. The place lay in ruins in some part. People were however celebrating the victory and freedom they now had.

Parts of the surrounding fence had been torn down and people were cheerful. I walked through the streets towards a large forest that surrounded a large part of the District.

"Johanna?" Iris said, standing next to me. I silently took her hand and walked into the forest. We walked like this for a while before I could hear the sound of crashing water.

"I promised I'd show you." I said to Iris. We emerged from the trees into view of a waterfall. The water was crystal clear and the area seemed untouched by war. The sound of the water brought back so many memories of the summer days I had spent here with my brothers.

Iris's hand left mine and she walked to the water's edged, sitting down on a patch of grass. I walked to her and sat down beside her. "It's beautiful." She said, running her fingertips over the water's surface.

I flinched and scooted away from the water's edge a little. I rested my head on Iris's shoulder and we both watched the water come down in sheets over the rocks. Maybe we could piece our lives back together.

A/N: sorry this chapter wasn't awfully eventful. I have a few more ideas that I want to implement but I'm suffering with a bit of a block. Next chapter will be better. Thanks to everyone who is still reading and enjoying this fic. Much love!


	24. Chapter 24

Iris POV

Johanna's breath was quick and hot against my ear and her nails were digging into the bare flesh on my back. There were small whimpering sounds escaping her lips every few breaths.

"Relax," I whispered . "I promise I'd never do anything to hurt you." I pressed my lips to her temple and rubbed her back. Her whole body was stiff and pressed firmly against mine.

We were standing knee deep in the water now. Johanna had wanted me to help her overcome her fear. The sun was already going down and the air was getting cooler. The sound of the water fall was soothing for me, but it only riled Johanna up.

"Let's go." I said to her, trying to get her to move back onto the bank. She held me firmly in place, her skin hot against mine. We both stood only in our underwear. "I want to do this." She said, her voice was weak and shaky.

"Johanna, we have plenty of time. Don't push yourself." I took her face in my hands. She looked into my eyes and loosened her grip on me. Her whole body was shaking and her pupils were dilated.

Before I had time to react, Johanna let go of me completely and walked further into the water. When it reached her waist, she dived under the surface, head first.

I held my breath and watched the surface. She was under for too long. I rushed in after her and submerged, searching frantically for her. I saw her silhouette and grabbed her around the arm, hauling her to the surface.

When we resurfaced, Johanna was like a statue. She gasped for breath, but her body was so stiff and was shaking so violently that I had to almost drag her to the bank.

Johanna thrashed around and her hands covered her ears. She was screaming and shaking uncontrollably. I wrapped my arms around and pulled her to my chest. I stroked her wet hair and rocked her gently.

"I'm here, Johanna." I cooed softly. "Nothing will hurt you." I covered her hands with mine and tried to get them away from her ears.

She turned and her nails slashed across the left side of my face. "I'll never tell you anything, you fucking bastards!" She screamed at me, running a few paces before collapsing in a heap next to a nearby tree.

Ignoring the pain from the scratches and wiping a drop of blood out of my eye, I approached her slowly. "Johanna." I said softly, "It's me. Iris." Her head snapped in my direction. Her eyes were almost black and her teeth were gritted.

"I won't tell you anything!" She yelled again. I knelt down next to her and took her face in my hands. I pressed my forehead to hers. Her hands pushed against my chest, but I stood my ground. She was much stronger than me, but I was more determined.

Johanna eventually tired and weakened. Her body relaxed and her breathing was going back to normal. She was seeing me now, not just looking at me.

Her face formed a mask of shock and horror. Her thumb shakily stroked over one of the scratches on my face. "I... I..." I pressed my finger to her lips. "No. It's okay." I said to her. I stood and pulled her to her feet. "Let's get you dressed."

We both pulled our clothes on in silence. Johanna started walking off into the trees. I had to jog to keep up. I reached her and put my hand on her shoulder. She shrugged it off and kept walking.

"Johanna." I called out to her. She stopped and turned, almost knocking me off of my feet. "I'm going to take you back to the train station." Tears were flowing freely and silently down her cheeks. "I'm only going to hurt you. You need to leave."

"I'm not going anywhere." I said, stepping closer to her. She took a step back. "It's not a debate." Johanna said through gritted teeth. Her jaw was clenching and unclenching. I stepped forward again. "I'll leave if you tell me you don't want me here." I said to her.

She turned again and started walking. "Don't turn your back on me Johanna." I said, clenching my fists. "You don't get to make this decision for me. If you send me away, it will kill us both. You know it."

Johanna didn't even turn, she just kept walking. I marched over to her and grabbed her by the shirt. I pushed her back against a tree and held her in place. "Look at me and tell me you want me to go." I sounded harsher than I had intended but Johanna was hard headed and difficult to get through to.

Her eyes scanned mine and lingered on the nail marks on my face. "I want you to...go." She said, falling over her words. I pressed me lips to hers and threw everything I had into that kiss.

"Tell me you want me to go." I repeated. She looked at the ground this time. "I want you to go." I pulled her chin up so her eyes were looking straight into mine. The last rays of sunlight reflected off of the tears on her face.

"Then I'll go." I said and let her go, walking away from where she stood. I didn't look back. The tears were stinging the cuts on my face. My ribs hurt and the stitches in my side were pulling with each step.

I found my way to the train station eventually. I had been in District 7 before but only on the Victory tour. I'd never actually seen the district. I sat down on one of the benches and pulled my knees up to my chest. The wind was cold against my damp skin and clothes.

The next train was probably only going to be coming through in the morning. I sat and stared at the darkening sky and tried to dull the pain in my heart. If Johanna didn't want me, then who was I to disobey her wishes?

I rested my forehead on my knees and closed my eyes.

I must have dozed off, because I woke with a start when I felt something cover my shoulders. I lifted my head and saw Johanna sitting next to me. She had covered me with a blanket and she sat, staring across the tracks.

"I..." She began, running her hand through her hair. "I don't want to lose you. I don't want you to go. But I know all I'll ever do is hurt you. I'm a broken person, and if I lose control like that again, I could hurt you really badly."

"If that happened," her voice dropped in volume a bit, "I'd never forgive myself." We sat in silence for a while. "If you hurt me," I said to her, scooting closer to her on the bench and curling into her side. "it will still hurt less than if you left." I finished.

Her arm wrapped around my shoulders and she pressed her lips to my head. Johanna stood and held out her hand to me. I stood and took it. Her fingers intertwined with mine and she led me through the streets of District 7.

There was the smell of smoke from the fireplaces in the houses and the sound of children's laughter from one of the houses. Everyone was finally at peace.

We reached an archway that led to a closed off portion of the district. "Victor's Village" stood out in intricate metal work over the archway. We walked under the arch and down a street that housed all the past victors of District 7.

Johanna led me down the walkway of one of the houses and opened the door. The lights were already on, and a fire crackled in the fire place. I stepped through the door and glanced around.

The house was big, but simple. I walked over to the fireplace and warmed my hands near the flames. "I'm just going up stairs to get you some dry clothes." Johanna said and turned. I dropped the blanket from around my shoulders and grabbed her.

My lips crashed against hers and I pulled her tightly against me. Her hands tangled in my hair and I guided her over to the couch nearby. I pushed her onto her back, not breaking the kiss. I lay on top of her and kissed her roughly.

Our tongues fought for dominance, while our hands wandered over each other's bodies. Johanna's hands were under my shirt, tracing patterns along my back.

I pulled my damp shirt over my head and threw it on the floor. Johanna's hands immediately made contact with my skin again. I kneeled over her and trailed kisses down her jaw and neck. Johanna sat up and took off her own shirt.

I stood up, and Johanna looked at me, questioningly. "Bedroom?" I asked her. She stood and kissed me, pressing her body to mine. She broke the kiss and grinned taking my hand and almost running up the stairs.

I followed and giggled. We reached her bedroom and she immediately pushed me against the wall. Her hand ran down my side and rested on my hip. It travelled down to my bottom and she lifted my leg up and hooked it over her hip.

My hands ran over her bare sides and moved around to her front. My hand cupped her right breast while my other ran through her hair.

Johanna moaned against my lips and picked me up. I wrapped my legs around her waist and she carried me over to the bed. She lay me gently on my back and then lay on top of me. My hands were frantically exploring every inch of her exposed skin.

With one hand, I undid the button on her pants and used the other to help shove them down off of her hips. She kicked the garment off onto the floor and kissed my collar bones. She straddled me and resumed kissing me.

I rocked my pelvis up against hers, trying to get some much needed friction. I unclipped Johanna's bra and threw it on the floor. I kissed her neck and trailed kisses down her exposed chest. Her back arched and I used her momentary weakness to flip her over onto her back.

My lips immediately brushed against her nipple and I swirled my tongue over it. Johanna's nails dragged down my back and she moaned, bucking her hips up against me. I pulled her bud between my lips and sucked it gently while my hand fondled her other breast.

Johanna's hands were pulling at my hair now and her moans spurred me on. I kissed down her stomach and stopped but above the waistband of her underwear. I hooked my fingers under the material and pulled it down her legs slowly.

Her eyes were watching me apprehensively. I kissed her lips once before going back to peppering kisses on her hip bones and on her inner thighs. Johanna's breathing was heavy and her hands were grabbing and twisting the duvet beneath her.

I trailed kisses up the inside of her thigh and gently placed a kiss on her centre. Her hips lifted off of the bed a little to try and make more contact. I obliged, and ran my tongue between her wet folds. I spread her legs a bit and circled my tongue over her clit.

Johanna moaned and her hands ran through my hair. I continued to kiss and lick her clit slowly, getting more vigorous as her moans got louder. "Iris." My name came out as a kind of breathy moan and it spurred me on more.

It wasn't long before Johanna's body shook and her back arched off of the bed. I slowed down and placed kisses on her thighs again as her breathing returned to normal. I moved up her body and lay on top of her, stroking her face.

Her brown eyes met mine, glinting with mischief. She rolled over on top of me. "I hope you aren't tired." She said straddling me. I giggled and ran my hands down her bare chest. "Not even close."


	25. Chapter 25

A/N: On request I will write Johanna's POV of the steamy encounter. Enjoy.

Johanna POV

I straddled Iris. My body was still buzzing and extremely sensitive, so her hands running down my sides sent shivers all the way up and down my back.

I kissed her gently and slowly, savouring the sweetness of her lips. My tongue explored Iris's mouth. She wasn't having any of this slow and sensual affection. Iris squirmed under me and almost groaned in frustration. I undressed her and ran my fingertips down her torso.

I pulled away and winked, sliding my hand between us and making contact.

Iris's hips pushed up into my hand and her head rolled back onto the pillow. Her mouth was slightly open and her breathing quickened.

I rubbed small circles on her sweet spot and rocked my hips in time with the movement. Iris's hands gripped onto my hips and she moaned softly. I used my free hand to take both of hers and pin them above her head.

She tried to fight me but I was stronger. I increased the pressure on her clit and she stopped fighting. I released her hands. "Now you better keep them there." I whispered in her ear before straightening up again.

My breath against her ear made her crazy and she had to grab the pillow to keep her hands above her head. I continued to give her clit attention then slowly slid one finger into her. She gasped and her body froze.

"Are you okay?" I said, staying still. She nodded and looked up at me. "Don't stop." She said. I carefully moved my finger in and out of her. Her body relaxed and her hips started to move in rhythm with my hand.

I worked slowly, rubbing her clit with my thumb simultaneously. I continued to rock my hips in time with hers and it only took moments before Iris's muscles all contracted and she let out a deep sigh. Her hand gripped my wrist and I slowly removed my hand.

I rolled over off of her and she pulled me close. Our naked bodies moulded into each other almost perfectly. Iris's face nuzzled against my neck and her breathing slowed down.

"I love you." She mumbled against my skin. I smiled and stroked her hair. "I love you." I echoed.

I lay with Iris in my arms, listening as her breathing evened out and slowed down. She was mumbling a bit in her sleep. It was incoherent, and she tightened her grip around my waist falling into a deep, peaceful sleep.

I closed my eyes and drifted off with her.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Iris's fingers stroked over my eyebrow. We were sitting opposite each other, cross legged on my bed. The sun was only just coming up, but both of us were sufficiently rested. Iris was wearing one of my button up shirts and her hair was misplaced and a bit wild looking from the previous night. She looked gorgeous.

My eyes couldn't stop falling to her face, where my nails had left nasty looking marks across her one eye. I had apologised profusely for it but Iris told me over and over again that it wasn't my fault. I wished I could believe her, but every time I looked at her, I knew I had the ability to hurt her again.

Her fingers were tracing over the scars on my face. "Where did you get this one?" She asked, running her thumb over my eyebrow again. There was a scar that ran directly over it, ending just above my right eye.

"Falling out of a tree. A branch nicked me on the way down." I took her left arm and pushed the sleeve up to her elbow. I ran my fingers over her forearm. Thin, faint scars littered almost her whole forearm. Some were pinkish, while others were older and fading already.

"What about these?" I asked her. She wanted to pull her arm away, but she fought the urge and let me touch the scars. "Some of them are tribute counts," She said. I examined her arm. "And the rest?" I asked. She shrugged and sighed. "Self inflicted mostly."

I pulled the sleeve back down to her wrist. "Why?" I was a little sad for her, but I knew we all had our vices. "Coping, I guess." She shrugged so I knew it was time for a subject change.

"Last night," I began. Iris blushed a little and fiddled with the sleeves of the shirt she was wearing. "Are you sure I didn't hurt you? You kind of froze." I finished.

"It was my first time." she said and stood, clearing her throat. She walked to the bathroom and took a drink from the faucet. I followed and leaned against the doorway. "Seriously?" I tried to hide the concern in my voice, but failed.

"Hey come on now." She said, walking over to me, wrapping her arms around my neck. She had to stand on her toes to kiss me. I kissed her back. "I'm glad it was you." She said, cupping my cheek. I put my hand over hers and sighed.

"You don't get to feel guilty about this." Iris said to me. "I want to repeat what we did over and over and over and over again." She smiled. I laughed and ruffled her hair.

We spent the morning talking about anything and everything. We decided to go out into the town for some breakfast. I had to still stock up on food. We didn't have a plan yet, but for now we were content with just being together.

Neither of us knew what tomorrow held, but we knew we would be facing it together.

A/N: Ending off the chapter with a bit of fluff. Hope you enjoyed it.


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